Monday, April 02, 2012

Fire! Fire!

I love fire. I got to do my favorite thing this weekend and play with fire. We had a ton of tree limbs that I had moved into the woods after a storm back in October or November. We can only burn things January through May. Finally I got to burn. It was awesome. I threw these giant logs in the middle of my lawn and just lit them up.

I had to pay for it though. My back has been having spasms for the past two days. While I was breaking off some branches I bent one and it snapped in such a way that it shot back at me and smacked my knee. PAIN! Also, wet limbs and charred limbs look alike but they feel a bit different. Ouch.

I have a lot of good fire stories as a kid. Like one day I was playing with matches in my room. Blowing them out and tossing them into the trash can in my room. One did not blow out and all of a sudden I had this huge fire going in my trash can. I did what any normal kid would do. I walked out of my room and pretended nothing was wrong. Luckily I was very bad at pretending and my parents wanted to know why I had this shit-eating guilty grin on my face. They smelled the smoke and grabbed the pail and tossed it in the sink.

Time to refocus.

I owe Josie a spanking but I can not remember why. Hey lets make it a virtual spanking. Lets all post "SPANK VeryJosie" on our blogs and link to her blog. Just like I did. Let's see how high of a ranking we can get off that when we search for VeryJosie.

I feel kind of bad for Tony. He has lost his self control this weekend and now a bankroll that was up to 6k recently is back down to 2k. I doubt he realizes it but one of these times he will not be able to rebuild and he will end up giving hand jobs to old guys on the Vegas streets. Wish I could help him because god knows I understand where he is coming from.

I am going to run for President. My platform will be "Just Fuck". It will abolish all concept of marriage. If you father a kid you pay for his upbringing but you do not have to support the woman. If your Gay, Straight, whatever you "Just Fuck". Insurance companies and medical providers will have to extend the current marriage rights to anyone living together or noted as a parent of the children.

I figure since more than 80% of people are paying spousal support and the other 20% hate their wives/husbands this plan will work. I will get the Gay vote, the divorced vote, the deadbeat vote, so remember Waffles 2016 - "Just Fuck". Peace.

4 Comments:

Blogger lightning36 said...

"I doubt he realizes it but one of these times he will not be able to rebuild and he will end up giving hand jobs to old guys on the Vegas streets. Wish I could help him because god knows I understand where he is coming from."

Please do NOT regale us with your stories of giving hand jobs to guys on the strip.

btw -- It must be the facination with fire. When I was in kindergarten a guy a year older and I were playing with matches and gasoline. We started his garage on fire, complete with fire trucks, blaring sirens, etc. I remember thinking that I would never be allowed to go outside again!

9:40 AM

 
Blogger Gary said...

In my family, there too was an "incident," involving the shed in the back yard. I'm not at liberty to discuss the details, except to say that my Dad called my middle brother "Sparky" for several years thereafter.

10:14 AM

 
Blogger Josie said...

Hmmm you want to spank me but can't remember why. I betcha I know a few reasons why...

10:47 AM

 
Blogger grrouchie said...

well, that's better than giving blow jobs for something warm in his belly

5:16 PM

 

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