Saturday, December 30, 2006

i Rai (Terrence Chan) has a nice post about some of the scum of the poker world including I would not play at a place that holds a guarenteed tourney then welches. The original post is from the Lion King Mr. Brodie who hangs out with strippers that are way too hot for him.. but I degress in my jealous rantings.. The PocketFives thread is worth a quick read too.. Let's bury these scumbags with an avalanch of bad press.


That was quick.. Ok. I actually have not busted out.. but I lost like 400.. including some nice beautiful MTT and SNG loses that just sting the soul. Like when I have 112 peeps left in the 18K deepstack.. and I have 15K in chips looking for a good hand.. I look down and see KK.. I raise.. the other guy pushes his ENTIRE 15K stack all in.. and turns over JJ.. SWEET! I turn a flush draw to make my hand even stronger and of course lose to the river jack.. I would have been the chip leader and the way I play I have very little doubt that I could have made the final table.. I only lost 5 of 5 hands with AA and KK vs beauties like TJ diamonds.. and other assorted crap hands in that MTT.. 80% my ass. I am lucky if I win 1 in 5 of those.

Tonights 55$ SNG rocked too.. I double up my first hand and play alright through until 21 people are left.. 6 spots pay $148+, and first pays a cool grand.. I have 4K in chips.. and I raise 88.. The flop comes 723 which is the best flop possible. I commit most of my remaining chips and the big stack calls.. The turn comes a king and king seven is the winner.. Fucking Poker hates me... I cant believe how ever fucking donkey catches their miracle fucking turn card on me you cocksucking donkey fucking bitch whore. Go fuck your grandma's you inbred pieces of shit. I fucking hate you all.

So I lost some money.. I cashed around $250 out.. and I am back to a bankroll of $200.. Playing in the kiddie pool again. I just love poker.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Year In Review

I came. I saw. I won alot of money. Ok probably not a ton of money.. but finally made a nice run and instead of being dead broke even I made a few thousand this year. I think this year was a good starting point on some growth. I played live finally. I went to a few blogger gatherings. I played a little bit of higher stakes games. I think some good things may happen next year.. of course I might just blow my whole bankroll and go off on a wild rant.. so keep checking in to see which one happens. be safe too. do not drive drunk like a fucktard. see you at the tables.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Fluxer, Haku and the Old Lady that Could

Ok.. I threw that last one in there for the fuck of it. I can not stand when there are only two objects in a title. So... Where to start. Fuck me. It has been a crazy ass last two weeks.. My bankroll looks like a sliding graph of a penny stock. I went from 50 up to 700 then back down to 39 then back up to 600 then back down to 200 in Neteller.. then I put fifty back in.. then I jumped up to 1100 in two days of playing. Crazy shit.

I even re-sucked out on Fluxer. The setup is this. I am playing a nice friendly 50/NL table and that chaos making bastard sits down. If you have not seen him tilt a table in person you are missing a true art show. It is amazing to watch totally solid, tight, Gary-esque players lose their fucking minds and become maniacs. All to get Fluxer.. and I just sit on the side and collect the spillage. So anyway.. the bastard gets me early when he forces me to fold TPTK. I then decide I am going to fuck him bad. So I get all in on the flop with him twice. Both times he has draws and I hold on to my nut sack for the win. The first time his draw was actually a much better hand than what I had made. I called his all in with QJo TPTK.. against his flush draw and overcard. The next time I had a set so it was more reasonable.

The final time.. well a picture is worth a thousand words..

I had him beat on the flop with the Kings.. he turns his flush which also pairs the board, and I runner-runner his azz into the ground with a boat on the river! BOOYAH! At least he made one of his draws. So.. I finish up that table with 3+ buyins and decide I should do some real work..

Of course Thromdog wants to play "Guess that blog" in IM chat. The premise of the game is that you paste a sentence into the chat window and have to guess the writer. The first one was easy.. it was an Ad for something.. DUGGLES! Yay! I win. The second guy however was a treasure. I have NEVER read this guy. You HAVE to read this guy.

.......Goddam I rule. The butterfly-wings on the chick front-left turned out to be *perfect* handles for when I was jamming her doggystyle later that night.

Here is a 2+2 excerpt on the man also..

All you want to do is play him for bankrolls to punish him?

I miss the good ole days of Party when his opponents created the "I hate Hak" club, and wanted to meet him at Treasure Island and beat the crap out of him. Now those were opponents that knew how to get pissed at him.

Fuck me! I have a long way to go. He has his chat perma-banned on Full Tilt for mouthing off to the mouth.. yes, Mike Matsou had someone banned for talking smack! HA! I love this guy. He is also banned from 2+2.. I thought I was the King but I humbly bow to my superior. Thank you so much JJ! It is rare for me to find a new blog and one like this.. whoooahh...

So I am not sure when I am going to start hating poker again but for now she is my baby.. I am on a crazy heater and I am going to enjoy it to the maximum. Good luck to you all on the felt!

I almost forgot this is for you Eric.. I sit down at the 1/2 table I was watching for a while and immediately start in. I buy in for eighty at first then raise to 100 to strike phear in their hearts.

ScottMc: speaking of loser donkeys
SirFWALGMan: woo hoo!
ScottMc: hahahaha $80
SirFWALGMan: come and get it girls
SirFWALGMan: hold on maybe this will put phear (Adds his final 20$)
SirFWALGMan: hows that?
ScottMc: candy a s s
SirFWALGMan: I am the Angry Turtle
ScottMc: you look like a hit and run guy
SirFWALGMan: probably
SirFWALGMan: Ill hit ya for 700 and run
Narena: miss and run
SirFWALGMan: Diahreeeahh! So nice to sit with you finally..
Narena: you realise this isn't play money right?
SirFWALGMan: maybe for a McDonalds working hoe like you it isnt
SirFWALGMan: oh wait I forgot I am unemployed.. never mind..
Narena: give the humour a miss if I were you
SirFWALGMan: oooh scary
SirFWALGMan: your so tough Diahhreahh
Narena: "you're" as in "you're a d.1ck"
Narena: not "your"
SirFWALGMan: omg! It is duggle buggers mother!!!
fluxer: lol
SirFWALGMan: I am sorry Mrs. Bugger I didnt know it was you
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: this table rules

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Playing with the Big Boys

Well Don lured me onto a 1/2 NL table again the bastard.. I had to work hard to get the buyin. I deposited $50 from the $200 I took out before I went on tilt and lost my whole $780 bankroll..

I went to a 50/NL table and played a little. I was playing solid. Tough. Poker. It felt good since I had played a lot of Donkey poker in the cash games lately. It was getting on my nerves. So I ran that up to exactly $100..

I then bought into MiamiDon's table. Don had been having a bad night. I think that is why he called in my easy money. He had been playing against Fluxer and while the two of them did not bump heads much it was funny to watch. Later on Mr. Dreamy sits down.. and finally this is the table I am faced with.

So basically you would expect me to get stacked. Except I got lucky. I played really well and I took some nice pots. I bought in for an initial $80.. then Mr. Dreamy started teasing me.. So I upped it to an AMAZING $100!

Early on I have pocket 3's. I flop a set on a 3-diamond board.. and I play it hard and fast. I get the other guy all in on the turn after cold calling his flop bet. he has a gut shot and diamond draw which he misses and I am out of the gate.

I remember playing a few other hands.. One hand where Fluxer tried to bluff me off a pot with king high. I had JJ and there were two queens on the board. I felt it was a bluff but was kind of scared to call as this would lose me half my stack. I thought it was equal chance Fluxer was putting pressure on me and he had a monster hand. I let the time run down then did the right thing and called. It felt like a bluff. It was. Phwehhhwww.

The other big hand of the night was against Smokeee. I call a $5 bet pre-flop with AJo. The flop gives me a gutshot and Smokkee leads out for $8. I could feel he wanted me in the pot. I thought he might even have a monster like KK. A king was on the board. So I call. The gutshot comes on the turn. So now a straight and a flush draw is on the board. I think he made a decent size bet here and I min-raised or just cold called. The river was a blank and I overbet the pot for $200. Smokkee thinks about it for a long time.. I think I taunted him a little.. and finally he calls. He turns over KJ s00ted for top pair and monster missed draws. I told him I thought it was a bad call.. and I still do.. just because it was me. I can not imagine at this point in time that I would bluff off half of my hard earned stack at this limit.

So I finally decided to call it a night. Not immediately.. but the hand with Fluxer gave me a neck ache, and the hand with Smokee made it travel down to my spine, and then my head started hurting, and I swear my heart stopped a few times. All in all I figured after five hours of play at 5AM in the morning it was time to call it a night. I had run $50 up to $700 in one night and well.. that does not happen often.. so it was time to go.

Poker is a weird beast. I lose over $580 in a few day period of tilt.. then I have the best single night I can remember in a while and make $700 playing cash.. I have never made that much in one night playing a cash game. Although I have come close. I feel the 1/2 game calling me.. I think I can play it. I sure as hell enjoy it. It will probably have to wait a while though.. until I am properly bankrolled.

I will say if you have a lot of money you should consider renting Fluxer for a game.. He puts a table on tilt like no one else I have ever seen.. I think in part it is why Smokkee called my big river bet.. he was thinking he was playing Fluxer.. Anyway, enjoy your work day you donkeys! I will enjoy my unemployment!!!!

Tuesday, December 26, 2006


Hope you all had a merry Christmas. I had a decent one. The greedy kids got a ton of toys. The boy bought me some nice things from the Patriots gift shop. A nice frozen mug.. key chain.. and a cold beverage holder..

I also got these..

.. and these ..

All in all not a bad Christmas take. I took the boy into the woods.. no not that one, my son.. idiots.. anyway.. he enjoyed the mud, water, and rain.. me not so much.. next walk tomorrow or the next day. I am going to show him the mountain!

Monday, December 25, 2006

Sports Betting

I like sports betting. I need action. I will bet on anything. I have the under +.5 on Terrel Owens spitting in someones face. Ok. Not really. If they had that bet though I would take it! I have been doing solidly mediocre so far. The college bowls have been the best as I went with a few of Don's picks and some other nice picks I found and have won a bunch of those. Here is my junkie action for today.

2 Team Parlay
(501) Los Angeles Lakers -2
(501) Los Angeles Lakers vs. (502) Miami Heat Over 201

(343) Philadelphia Eagles +7 (Don liked them so much I had to put something on them)

(345) New York Jets +2½ Mon@8:30p

.. and the grand daddy of them all.. another of my favorite parlay bets that I never win..

4 Team Parlay
(343) Philadelphia Eagles +7
(343) Philadelphia Eagles vs. (344) Dallas Cowboys Over 48
(345) New York Jets +2½
(345) New York Jets vs. (346) Miami Dolphins Under 37

Why did I ever go to the sports book with Don..

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Xmas

Merry Xmas to all you tards. I have been around. I went on a nice walk/bike ride with the boy the other day. It is funny just the other day he was riding his big wheel down the hill outside our house and I was worried he was going to crash.. now he is older, and the big wheel has become a mongoose with no training wheels.. and I am still afraid he is going to crash.. the more things change the more they stay the same..

So what have I been up too.. Well .. I had a nice roll going and donked it off yet again. I did manage to save off a few hundred for reload purposes so when I feel like it I shall reload.. until then I can do the Jesus Ferguson 1$ to a million challenge.. cause that is close to what I have left..

I have been having a great time donking the money away though.

I played a LHE MTT. It went as expected.

SirFWALGMan: what the hell is wrong with you people
SirFWALGMan: brain damaged
SirFWALGMan: one more hand and I can forget Ii swear though I have hardly ever playd with such retards in my entire life ever played with you retards

This was after I got called on a raise when I had AJ.. Ace flops. The guy who called two bets pre-flop figures he is good for a runner-runner straight which he catches.

SirFWALGMan: why did you fold? I wanted to end my misery!

This was after J9 calls my pre-flop bet raise I have A9 flop is KKQ and he goes for his gutshot straight draw and makes it.

SirFWALGMan: i swear just let your dogs play
SirFWALGMan: they will make better decisions
SirFWALGMan: if you dont have dogs
SirFWALGMan: go rent a mental kid
SirFWALGMan: such fucking retards
SirFWALGMan: how the hell can you beat them
Mr. Dreamy: i prey on stupidity
Mr. Dreamy: man god hates you

It is so true.. why does nobody ever believe me.. I ended up going out of that one when the SB raised me.. I had QQ.. we bet it down to the river and he had KK.. Finally someone has the better hand..

I had more of the same tonight. I run into a guy. I am in the BB or SB with some limpers so I go ahead with my Q2 s0000ted. The flop is Q2x and I push all in when the guy bets out. The turn is a 7, the river, a 7, and he has QT.. We end up splitting.

piperppoker: gg
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: learn to count tard
piperppoker: lol
SirFWALGMan: i had you dominated
SirFWALGMan: say "thank you poker gods that my retarded self was given a second chance"
piperppoker: hey candy $%@
piperppoker: you are my target now
piperppoker: keep going in hands with %@%$ty kickers
SirFWALGMan: dude I had 2 pair
SirFWALGMan: so &$&#ing look at the board
piperppoker: q 2
piperppoker: lol
SirFWALGMan: before you make stupid comments

This retard was so bad. I mean calling a re-raise all in with TP ten kicker. I hate these people. I finally made this prediction.

piperppoker: keep playing those
SirFWALGMan: your a dumb $%$ donkey
SirFWALGMan: so stfu
SirFWALGMan: you think QT is gold
SirFWALGMan: so go eat some oats
piperppoker: ok
piperppoker: keep yapping
SSPadawon4: cool
SirFWALGMan: your not gonna make the money
SirFWALGMan: your not even going to come close

So then the flop comes 998. He gets raised all in and this happens. He says this before he calls.

piperppoker: uh oh, im screwed. oh well no money for me

Dealer: piperppoker shows [Ad 8d]
Dealer: SSPadawon4 shows [Jd Jc]
Dealer: piperppoker shows two pair, Eights and
Dealer: SSPadawon4 shows two pair, Jacks and
Dealer: SSPadawon4 wins the pot (4,614) with
two pair, Jacks and Sixes
piperppoker: gg

Of course I was a good sport.

SirFWALGMan: see I was right you tool
SirFWALGMan: what a moron
SirFWALGMan: he probably has never won anything in his whole life
piperppoker (Observer): i had to kinda go, i knew i was beat before i called candy @&@
SirFWALGMan: dude you lost 281$ playing SNGs (according to Shark Scope)
SirFWALGMan: maybe you should quit while your ahead

Ya you had to go alright. You sucking bastard.

Go Congrat Sucko on his nice win tonight! Merry Xmas you retard! He scored final table money in the 300K or something.. Ick who?

It was also fun playing some LHE with the good Dr. Pauly.. and his brother even railed for a bit. The 5/10 play on Full Tilt is HORRIBLE. I got knocked out when a guy with 69o called my K3o down and caught a 9 on the river. ick.

Pro vs the Fool Part Duex

So when I last left you I thought I had won our first Pro vs Fool match up but in reality I just did not read Don's convoluted bets correctly and the score stands at Don +2 the Fool -2. Since then I have been betting on everything that moves and figuring out how this whole thing works. I am break even to this point.

Anyway.. for this weeks picks I am throwing in a nice five team parlay to spice things up. First the individual bets:

(339) San Diego Chargers vs. (340) Seattle Seahawks Under 46 Sun@4:15p
(345) New York Jets +2½
(331) Chicago Bears -6 (-105) Sun@1:00p

Then I am doing this whopping big five bet parlay for the big money baby.

(319) New Orleans Saints vs. (320) New York Giants Under 47½
(325) Indianapolis Colts vs. (326) Houston Texans Under 47
(331) Chicago Bears -4½
(337) Cincinnati Bengals +3
(339) San Diego Chargers -4½

Who knows what will happen with the fools picks. It could be the week when the luck of the picks comes through and I make a HUGE score baby! HUGE! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! I did very well this weekend on MiamiDonks bowl picks. He is very good at the college thing.

Friday, December 22, 2006

Diety of the day...

TJINIMIN, (AU) Sex-starved Bat God. ... My kind of God!

Thursday, December 21, 2006


We have a new sponsor "Bonus Key" They have a number of new "poker bonus codes" for new and existing players. Help support our sponsors.

It is nice to get a little hit to the bankroll from the Advertising. It has really picked up this year. So much so that next year I am going to announce rate increases!!!

Thanks to CC for the complement he paid to me. I knew that I could huggle myself with my huge junk but I am not sure how he found out.

Mid Life Crisis

So I quit my job today. I have no other job lined up but it feels kind of good. I think Kat was right when she said "Good It was killing you". I have never really liked corporate America type jobs.. I usually end up taking that kind of job because it is where the money is. Working for this company though was bad. I swear you could feel the little workers souls being sucked out of them day by day. So hopefully I can get my act together and find something I can enjoy a little more.

I decided to go for a walk today. Get the energy up and try and get my life moving in a better direction. My wife suggested that I go walk in the woods surrounding our town. Now I have lived in this town for over seven years but have never walked in the woods. I had some concern that I would become lost and they would find my bloated body somewhere during the spring thaw. The walk was great and very invigorating. I was a little spooked at first being in the woods.. all alone.. where bears and wild dogs could get at me. I then remembered that bears hibernate during the winter so I felt a little safer.

Until I came across the pond.. dead bloated body.. that kind of freaked me out a little. I did a look around for any packs of wild dogs or serial killers and kept walking.

The path finally opened up into a little picnic grounds with a little pond.. dead bloated body .. and I walked around to the other side. It was a nice little place. There was a dam on the other end and I looked over the side and saw a two story drop to the bottom with water flowing down.. dead bloated body .. and was able to successfully navigate this.

I then took an uphill route that branched off my route. I climbed and I climbed with my heart pounding in my chest.. hoping I would not have a heart attack.. and crossed over a little stream.. dead bloated body.. until I climbed to the top of this mountain. On the very top was the most perfect Christmas tree you could ever see. It was bright green and healthy and full of nature. I looked around from my vantage at the top of this huge mountain and the only sign of civilization I could see was Boston to my left. The rest of the world was a sea of tree's and mountains. It was very stunning. I sat down on a rock and just soaked it all in as I caught my breath and tried to get my heart running again. I was seated Indian style and just relaxed and enjoyed the chilly winter air. I finally got my body in some condition to move again and found my way back to my house somehow. I then promptly passed out on the couch and awoke a few hours later. All in all a great way to spend the morning.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006


I miss Jewels.. She could keep me safe from stuff like this. I never even knew this existed..


I am feeling very melancholy these days for whatever reason. Not that that is not my normal state of existence but just feeling it more. I have no idea why. I guess it might be because I had such a great time in Vegas. I enjoyed meeting up with people I feel I have gotten to know over the last few years.

I really think the girlie chat while eggagerating people's personalities in some ways shows more of who the person is or would be. It is a very soul revealing mechanism and besides the online poker geeks I have met I also have made some of the best and longest lasting relationships of my life that way.

I understand how a lot of people do not get Vegas. To them it was all excess and damaged people going nuts. Well I hate to tell you most of the people in the world are damaged.. some people are willing to admit it and others just go on like everything is fine. To me Vegas was all about a big, crazy, family, with all the issues a family has, getting together for a holiday to just enjoy one another. We celebrate the fact that we know each other and that is good enough for me.

Some people will never really get that and I feel sorry for them.

Pokering wise things have been going exceptionally well. I have driven the bankroll up past the six hundred mark from the low of thirty bucks just two weeks ago. I am sticking to what I am doing well at. SNGs. I have a 254% ROI on the 20$ SNG. I.E. I am undefeated. Obviously this will not last but it is fun. I also have a 1,780% ROI on 5.50 MTTs. I am not really tracking my MTT results right now since I am making my money from SNG play but it is a fun little number. Sports betting.. well, I am learning.. I suck so far. It has been fun though.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Winning Never Felt So Bad

So in week one of the Pro vs the Fool I win. Don bet 4 units on a single parlay and lost. I bet 3 units that lost and I won my Dallas pick. Nah nah nah nah. Ok. Actually being down a unit does not feel so good. I wonder if the Pro and the Fool will both go broke? Nahh.. The Pro did good on his other side bets for the weekend.

Poker bankroll keeps rising. Not much to say on that front. Feeling a little blah lately so not writing as much.. Go congrat Kat for winning in the 9K guaranteed!!! Now she does not have to Huggle with CC WOO HOO!

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Beyond Furious

Wow. I just had my opponent bent over and my member right on the lips of her asshole two times and lost. Razz sucks. Even if I came in second. I shoulda fucking won!!!! DAMMIT! After that fucking SNG that lasted forever and I lose a huge lead with AT vs A9, A6 vs A5 and JJ vs an OESD.. I AM FURIOUS! At least it was a $130 night but still.. motherfucking poker.

Oh yeah and Dallas won. So I am 1 for 3 so far in the NFL picks. How can I win so much money tonight and still be so ticked off. You know why? Because poker has nothing to do with money for me. It is blatantly obvious. Poker is all about me WINNING. That is what Poker is. And will be. Forever. More.

I just got done reading CC's article on how all of us Poker Bloggers are weak-tight. While I disagree with the general premise and think CC was trying to be amusing.. in his retarded red headed step child way.. I thought the article was very very good and I liked a lot of what Sucko had to say. No link to you CC because I think you were trying to be controversial to get a link so...

Until next time...

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Poker Comics

Friday, December 15, 2006

The Fools Picks: Week 15

Ok. This is a really tough week. A ton of games you know the team that is going to win but the spreads are so high it gets tough to pick. Now normally being a gambooler I like to do parlays and do a single team bet to cover. This week I could not find a 5-team parlay I really liked. So my picks are going to be TWO single team bets and a 3-team parlay. Normally I will be doing 1-Single Team, 1 3-team, and 1 5-team. Hopefully worse case I would break even.

Over Indy vs Bungles (54.5) 2 Units to win 2 Units
I like the over here. It is a HUGE freaking over but I think this game could easily see a losing team with 30 points. I hope this game just goes ape shit and we have a blood bath going.

3-Team Parlay - The HUGE Spreads 1 Unit to win 6 units
I have no real faith that either Chicago or Sandiego will cover.. but we will see. I think I have a shot here.. as well as Miami playing poorly in the cold.
Buffalo +1
Chicago -14
Sandiego -9

Dallas +4 1 unit to win 1 unit
I like Dallas and I think Romo has a good game this weekend. At least I hope so. I really think they will hunker down and pull this one out.

So those are the fools picks for the weekend. We will have to wait for the Pro to make his picks.

A Pictorial Tribute to Michael Craig

Michael Craig


Michael Craig

Bald Guy

Michael Craig

Jay Sherman

Michael Craig


I want to go home..

It is 4:26 EST and I want to go home.. One half hour more baby.. then I can go to my night job! Woo hoo! Ok.. I think maybe I should take the night off. I have been KILLING myself lately.

I usually only browse Bill Rini as he is a little too intellectual for me.. Hell Dr. Seuss is a little too intellectual for me! Except for the porno book he did! Now that was right up my alley! He had a nice counterpoint to Duggle's post on Full Tilt. While I agree it sucks what happened to Duggles I know that kind of thing can and does happen on other sites. It is like he is blaming the Hispanics for all the murders.. Dammit the Blacks are out there killing people too!!! I kid. I kid. I think we White guys have the lock on murder per square inch of history.

I do not think keeping a working roll online and the rest in quickly reachable vehicles like Neteller or an Internet Bank is a bad one though. As much as I like Full Tilt or any other poker site, why give them the interest on your money? If you keep enough for the short term swings in your poker account and the rest somewhere you can get at it quickly then you can both make money and hopefully be safer.

JJ finally had one of his boys score!! Go tell the big lug congrats! He is looking for an Ace of spades to match his three queens so say the pee pee prayer and wish him well.

Carmen is eating large in her old stomping grounds of Maryland! I never got to see you off girl!!!! Give me a call if you get a free second, you know, if your bored out of your skull and can not think of anything worse to do.

I am locking down my final picks for the games this weekend.. Going to be an interesting Football betting weekend as all of the Favorite have HUGE spreads. It is a little nerve wracking hoping a team can cover 9-14 points.. I think the favorites are going to get it done this weekend though.. and I have my lock of the week picked out already..

Ok. Peace out. Enjoy your weekend. I am not sure how much poker goodness I get in this weekend as I will be.. say it with me people.. working, yes, I have such an exciting life.. I have to make up for all the money CoxLover sucked out of me when he cracked my tens with that fucking Anna Kornacuntia. Biatch!

** P.S. In case you have never noticed before it is usually good to hover over the links I provide to certain people as it can give clues to how I really feel.. *wink* *wink*

*** P.S.S. Oh yeah, did anyone even fucking bother to read my post about Don and I at the sports book? Not one single comment. Jesus. I work hard here people! I need my ego constantly stroked! Go read it if it got lost in the jumble of ad's and all other kinds of crap I keep posting.. huh? What's that? Oh, my insecurity is showing.. let me tuck that back in.. Ahhh.. that's better..

The Pro vs the Fool

My good friend Fluxer wants you to check out his latest post. I really hope that Duggles gets his money back. Only chance of that is if he can track the IP back to a physical person and then threaten legal action. Not even sure it is worth it.

As for me.. Not really concerned about my Full Tilt funds. I am not sure how someone got in on his account but it is not THAT easy. I am leaving my funds in at Full Tilt and playing as I always do. I am glad that Full Tilt gave Duggles the IP information for the person who stole his funds. I do hope they investigate this further and do something. I am waiting to see what happens in the end before flaming a site that I have had excellent experiences with. I am really not concerned personally.

*** EDIT: While it is nice that the Poker Blogger community sticks up for one of it's own I think the whole "Everyone take your funds out before you lose them" attitude is insane. Total overreaction. Nothing about what happened to Duggles makes me feel any less safe at Full Tilt. It also is nothing that could not/has not happened at other sites. It is part of the cost of living in a world of Hackers and scammers. It sort of reminds me of Henny Penny and the Sky is Falling..

Work has been kicking my ass so I have not been playing much. I got home from work at 11PM last night. It is good because I get paid hourly. However it takes a toll.

I just realized I have been to Vegas 2-time and even stayed up at the IP all night Friday night and I have YET to see a Hooker or a Stripper!!! I blame these two for not taking care of me!! Curse you!!!!

I am starting up my sports betting career. I had such a good time with Don I decided to start a new feature here at Ramblings of a Mad Man: The Pro vs the Fool. Don and I will set up 4-units of bets before Sunday each week on NFL teams and list them publicly on our blogs. We will see who does better with the sports betting each week. Will the Pro kill the Fool? Will the Fool outpick the Pro? Who will end up ahead? I know we are starting this a little late but we can finish through Football season and then maybe move on the Basketball or something if it goes well. There is a chance I may bust before the end of the season too. I am under-bankrolled for Sports betting but I am just in it to have some fun. If I start winning I will keep to bankroll recommendations. My picks will be up tomorrow and I welcome any feedback.

Thursday, December 14, 2006


While I actually agree with most of what this is saying there is no way I am an ENTP. If you have ever met me you might call me a prick but not an Extrovert.

My score on The Brutally Honest Personality Test:

Prick- ENTP

(53% Extraversion, 56% Intuition, 70% Thinking, 20% Judging)

People love to hate you, because you love to argue. The strange thing is you probably took that as a compliment. Why, I bet you've already got a witty comeback all lined up ready to throw right back at me.

What you don't realize is that your inane obsession with debating pisses everyone off. Whatever happened to us all trying to get alone? I mean, you're so annoying people disagree with you for the damn sake of it! NOBODY cares about your abundant opinions. Trust me.

Believe it or not, but there's more to life than your expansive knowledge and sharp repertoire. When was the last time you showered? Brushed your teeth?

While you're up in Never never land, getting excited over future possibilities and your crazy theories, WE have to put up with your awful stench. I can smell you from here.

Your personality is ideal for that of a future lawyer and because everyone already hates you, you have nothing to lose.

Link: The Brutally Honest Personality Test
(OkCupid Free Online Dating)

Betting the Losers With Don or I should have went with the Ravens!

SO I finally got a few hours sleep in Vegas and was bright eyed and bushy tailed when MiamiDon was ready to go to the office. Now when I first heard that I was going to the sports book with Don I was less than excited. I mean what fun could that be? A bunch of old guys writing numbers on scraps of paper and hoping that their SS check does not go up in flames. Boring. Was I ever wrong!

See sports betting has nothing to do with sports or betting. Nope. It is all about picking a team that the rest of the sports book does not pick and rubbing it in their faces when your team wins. It is macho. It is wild. It is awesome!

We got to the sports book and Don sets up his office in the back. Basically the Red Rock's sports book looks like a library. You have your little desk with short dividers separating. Your nice library chair. If it was not for the three jumbo screens in front you might think you should be studying algebra. In addition to those screens every cubicle has it's own TV set.

Pretty soon Don's coworkers come in and they start talking shop. They talk about the hair brained ways they bet: "Yeah, if the last time it was an over, then the next time I bet the under". How they did on yesterdays college games and who they are picking today.

I decide I need to put a little money on something so I pick the suckers game to end all suckers game: The five team parlay. You basically only have to pick five bets correctly and you win 23 to 1. Nice odds. So I decide to slap a twenty down. I ask Don for his picks and finally come up with the following card:

NE vs Miami (Under 42 Points)
Bungles vs Oakland (Bungles)
Iggles vs Washington (Iggles)
Colts vs Jacksonville (Jacksonville)
Houston vs Vince Young (Houston)

Now I asked Don why he liked Houston so much! He LOVED Houston. He thought that they were going to kick some ass. You sure I mean the Titans have been on a run? His confidence convinced me that I should go with Houston instead of lets sayyy... Carmen's favorite Ravens. The reason I was thinking Ravens is because they were rested and needed this game. I thought they would win. However I went with Don and some crazy Chinese man. I put twenty bucks down for a shot at $480. I was rolling.

After I finished booking my bet I went and grabbed breakfast at the Red Rock. mmmmm. mmmmm.

The festivities started out most excellent. Indy starts by driving and the whole sports book erupts with cheers and yelling... until Jacksonville runs the ball down their throats. All of a sudden you can hear nothing at all... Except the entire back row. Don's team! Screaming and yelling! PAIIIII GOWWWWWWWWW! WOOOOT! YAAAAAAAAA! We were fucking owning baby! The four of us who picked the underdogs were owning the place. There is something entirely satisfying about being the only few people to have picked correctly.. and rubbing it in to the extreme.

So the games continued.. the hot waitresses kept coming by.. My teams went up and down. At one point I had every bet winning and it was looking really good for me. My throat was soar from yelling PAIIII GOWWWWWWWWWWWWW! The games started winding down and I found myself with a ticket that had four winners on it. I also found myself going into overtime with the Houston vs Titans game tied. WOW! I had a nice little $480 score just begging to happen. Of course I got one outered on the river when Houston for some inexplicable reason decides to blitz Vince Young on 3rd and 19. I saw the whole defense split to both sides of Vince and knew it was over as he stepped up in the pocket and ran for the winning touchdown. So close yet again. So close. I will say I did get at least twenty bucks worth of entertainment if not more. I signed up with BoDog to try some sports betting too. I will let you know how that goes.

The rest of the day was spent at the MGM losing a buyin at poker and having dinner with Weak. If you ever have the misfortune of serving him you best hurry up. heh. Before I knew it I was heading for my plane and fighting through the fucked up lines of America West. The automatic check-in was down so I had to go through the full baggage check-in and it was messy.

I hit the redeye out of Vegas and tried to get some sleep. It is really hard to sleep in the isle seat. I finally pulled down the food tray and slumped over that. This turned out to be a big mistake as my fat gut and intestines were squished up into my waist and I woke up in a ton of pain wanting to puke.

It was a total blast.. even better than the last time I went. I spent less time playing poker and more time hanging out with old friends and new. Financially it was a weekend of what could have been but emotionally it was a big boost. I have a ton of memories that will stay with me forever. I loved spilling beer down Kats shirt and meeting the Scary Lady. Gambling with Don. Meeting new bloggers and old. Seeing everyone again. As I am sitting in my depends and eating cat food while the orderly at the nursing home abuses me because he can not get a date since he smells like old people I will remember these moments. In the end really all we have left is our memories. Thank you all for sharing some with me.

The Following is a Paid Review for PokerTeam.Com

The Following is a Paid Review for PokerTeam.Com.

Apparently I am a popular guy with ReviewMe... Anyways.. seems to be a Poker Newsletter online. It has articles about poker that you can read. It is in the style of a news site and the articles are all about poker rooms opening or people getting busted in raids. The news section has an RSS feed which makes it easy to subscribe to using Bloglines or any other RSS feed aggregator.

In addition to the news section there are articles on how to play poker. There are not a ton of these articles and they all cover basic topics but if you are new to poker you might enjoy them. It seems as if they site is relatively new and I would assume that more features will be added as they grow.

The site seems to be a nice little news site to get information from. I have subscribed to it through my bloglines and you can too.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The following is a paid review for Cardschat

The following is a paid review for Cardschat Poker Forum.

I have always been an advocate of Poker forums. Like Blogs they offer a place to discuss strategy, ask people about hands, and learn a little about what people think about Poker. The forum portion of Cardschat has two sections that I could see as a guest. It might be nicer to break it down into a few more sections but the posts were pretty good and some nice reading in the sticky post sections.

In addition to the normal forum features they have have articles, reviews of many sites, signup bonus's for new players and even a blog!! In reading through some of the content of the site I thought it was laid out well and enjoyed my time there. I would recommend it to anyone looking to join a forum. You know what I say.. If it's free it's for me!!!

Waffles Rants about Electronic Poker Dealers AKA Someone better call Poker Tek Before I post this AKA Ok It is not that bad

I feel like I should put a post in about Poker Tek. They are the guys who make the electronic dealer tables. They invited the bloggers to a nice party with free booze (I know not such a big deal in Vegas). I want to start by saying I really appreciate the invite. It was awesome.

I went to the party they threw after the Blogger MTT.. So I was operating on 1 hour of sleep and STILL had not changed my clothes which were in a bag which I checked the night before at the MGM. Yeah, ok, ewww.

Here are some notes. First of a minor point: when you invite me to a party and have a hot model on the invite have one there also. I am not saying she has to rub up against my leg and tell me how hot I am but at least have a little eye candy. I mean you could have probably gone down to the Geisha bar and grabbed some worn out looking hookers for modeling duty. I guess Poker Tek wanted the product to stand out for itself or something.

I tried out the product and in general I liked it a lot. In some ways it felt weird to be sitting at a table and playing "Internet" poker with a bunch of people. It is really hard to use something for one time and feel comfortable with it. I bet you all remember the first time you switched from Party to Stars or Full Tilt.. It just felt odd to you. I think with a little practice I might get used to it.

I did not like when it allowed me to fold my blind. I know it warned me I was going to fold.. But an extra line of warning or a different color might have alerted me to the fact that nobody had raised and I could check. I would think there may be some gambling laws that force them not to do this but if not I think it would be helpful.

I ended up finishing up around fourth. Not too shabby.

I am not sure I would drive two hours to my local casino and play a computer game. It does not feel the same as live chips and cards in your hands. I just am not sure what the motivation would be. Also how would you stop that fat kid from hogging the machine? What orderly way would you move people in and out of SNGs? Just a logistical issue.

I think in Vegas where a casino is every ten feet this kind of thing would work out better. Also if the SNGs played on machines took a lot less rake that might be a motivation to play them. Right now at Foxwoods the 100/SNG has a 20$ fee.. if a machine version of this had a much lower rake then I might be interested.

I think that the Heads Up Version of the product may end up being the big winner for these guys. You can stick them in airports or bars or what not and have a nice King of the Hill kind of game going on. It appeals to the little tiny bit of man-ness I have in me. It hits a primal cord. I could absolutely see myself playing that machine with a few buddies in a casino. Possibly as I wait for my table.. or while Jordon waits for me to finish after he busts out. It has some possabilities.

One last thing. Poker Tek had EXCELLENT swag. I LOVE my tee shirt and wish I had grabbed a few more. I wear it everywhere and it is soft and comfy and much enjoyed! If they ever fail at this whole dealer free poker thing they should go into shirts. Only thing that was a little weird is that nowhere on the shirt does it say anything that gives me a clue about the company or the website to go to in order to get information. It is somewhat poor as an advertising vehicle.

So all in all I found the machine well build. The software worked great. I have no idea if the business model is viable but it seems like a solid company with a well made product. Thank you for the invite! I appreciated it.

I also had a few pictures snapped by Linda! I have read her blog for a while and really enjoy it. She seems really cool even if I only got a few minutes with her. She snapped my picture with her bazooka camera though which was cool. I felt like I was in a terminator movie as that red-beam drew down on me.

Next Up: Betting the Losers With Don or I should have went with the Ravens!

Cox Lovers Revenge

So when I last left you I was getting an hours worth of sleep at my friend Carmens place. For all of you perverts out there Carmen and I have a good relationship: She thinks I am homely, and I am married. It works out good that way.

So with my one hour of sleep I drag my ass over to MiamiDonks house to prepare for the WPBT Main Event. I actually was feeling really good. I do not sleep well normally and sometimes one hour is better for me than six. The SoCo had made peace with my tum tum and all I needed now was breakfast! So Don and I hooked up with Veneno and had an awesome egg and bacon breakfast. I love breakfast. It is the best meal ever. Eggs, Bacon, Toast, Waffles, where can you go wrong? Not a single thing that is easy to ruin either.

So we finally get to the tourney and I get a much easier table than last year. Where the prior year had me facing the likes of Absinthine and Spaceman, a couple of poker book writers.. Alright so one of them was that Donkey Michael Craig who never takes these things seriously.. or maybe that is his "A" game? I guess anyone can write a book.

Instead of a couple of WSOP contenders and book authors I get the following lineup.

April. Much improved since our days at Poker Stars but I knew I could tilt her by incessantly rambling and yelling Pai Gow!! every five minutes and coughing into the pot so she would not want to win it.

Chilly. Pffft.

CC. God if there is anyone I wanted to stack more I do not know who it might be.

Otis. Great player but he was hung over and thus unable to do much.

MiamiDonk. Another tough player who I respect a hell of a lot. I do however know his game a little bit and I think I play better against people I know. Also I figured he would blind out before he became a problem.

Veneno. The queen of the sick suckout.. I would have to watch out for her.

Leigh? Lee? Leah? Sorry Girl. I do not know your blog.. and missed your name. Amy seemed to know you..

I can not remember the whole tourney as it was a blur. I will recount what I can and I apologize for any inaccuracies. It started out pretty good for me. I would be picking on Leigh all day. Not because she was weak or anything. Just because I got good cards when she had the second best. I stacked her for the first 1500 when I called a modest 3xBB raise with 78h. The flop came J78 and she lead out. I cold called. The turn was a low card and when she bet again I put her all in. She flipped over pocket kings and the cowboys were cracked.

I played several hands badly against CC. It was good that I had accumulated some chips earlier or I may not have survived. I honestly underestimated the guy. His live game MTT was so much different than his online donkey style that I did not adjust well. I was suitably impressed. He never really overplayed any hands and extracted some good chip value from me. I also called off a little too much when I knew he was on a draw and failed to notice the club that made his flush. Ooops. I finally was able to knock his ass out of the tourney in what was one of my proudest moments. I really did not play the hand poorly or well I just had Aces when he had AQ and a shortish stack. It was fun though.

I knocked Leigh out on a hand I honestly forget. She was very nice throughout the whole thing and she gave me a shirt as a bounty! I think I knocked her out after April was gone and Amy had sat down at our table. I really loved the short time I spent with Amy. I could tell she had a great sense of humor along the lines of my own. She was excellent competition and a joy to play with.

I made a monster bluff on Irish guy. He raised pre-flop and something inside me said he had a middle pocket pair. I called with ducks and when the flop had an ace I took a shot at it. He folded and I showed my little quackers. I forget Irish guys name. He comes all the way from Dublin and gets a “Irish Guy"from me. Heh. Start a blog and maybe I will give you more than Irish Guy!

I remember one nice setup that just was not to be also.. The hand before Chilly says I better stop stealing his blind. So I talk some smack and look down and see Aces. I ask him "How much do you want me to bet? How much will you call?".. he says he will call my all in but folds when I drop three 1K chips onto the felt.. I had a good time telling him that I had 52 s000ted. Heh.

I played maybe one or two hand against Veneno and MiamiDon.. I bluffed Don off of one hand and attacked his blinds as much as I could but we did not mix it up for the most part. I think Veneno took down a few small pots against me. I tilted April to the point where she just wanted to leave. She also says I gave her the plague but I am not sick so I think she has to find some other frog to blame that kiss on. Hell she probably got it from just touching the bar at the IP.. that place CAN NOT be sanitary.

Derek came to play at our table for a while. I always enjoy it when I get to spend some time with him. One of the nicest guys ever.

I also got to shout out "Hey Sucko!" to that luckbox before he went out. Nothing like a live Sucko!

After what seemed like an eternity we got moved to a new table. I had a decent but not huge chip stack and I had been playing really well. Busting CC had enabled me to keep ahead of the blinds and with four tables left things were looking good. I got seated just in time to see Ray Ray go busto. I think like three people called his all in with the short stack. See Smokkee I am not the only one who does not like you. I had CoxLover at this table as well as Daddy. That fucker is both lucky and good. I wish I was lucky.

I actually enjoyed getting some time with Soxy. He was very laid back and mellow all trip. I had a good time talking and hanging with him. We will get to the reason I am calling him CoxLover soon enough. I do not remember doing too much at this table. I saw Weak get sucked out on by Daddy. Daddy had a HUGE stack and was using it to bust people left and right. Before I knew it we were down to two tables.

I had a smallish but decent stack and was looking good for making it to the money. I had Irish Guy at my table. CoxLover. Tobyleah was the shortstack. I had actually busted her friend/boyfriend/husband/lover I dunno.. whoever she was there with earlier in the night. I had a nice conversation with her after she became bubble girl and she is a really sweet person. I do not think she knows I kicked her man to the curb though. It was also good that both Daddy and Veneno were at the other table. AlCantHang was also nursing some chips at my table. Big hug and congrats to Veneno for taking second with her amazing Poison powers live and in action!

So anyways all was going fairly well when CoxLover got a brain tumor and started raising every fucking hand. I mean he pushed all in like seven times in a row. We finally get to the hand that sealed my fate. CoxLover has 90K in chips and I have him covered by 2K or so. The blinds are 10/20. So he pushes his entire stack in with KQ. I fucking hate that hand. I look down and see some tens and they look pretty good about now. I think about it long and hard. I finally turn to Sox and say “I know I am going to regret this but I call”. Of course I end up regretting it as a queen hits the flop and basically I am done. I was steaming. I only said fucking CoxLover like four or five times. Really.

In hind site I question a few things about this hand. First off do I call here or do I let it go? I am in 13th place and four to the money. I think a case can be made for either move. The more aggressive players going with the "Hell yeah you were ahead you have to call" and the more "Make the money" type players saying there is no need to call. I am still up in the air as to which I should have done and I am not sure that an answer exists. It is not always right to do something just because you are ahead. While I tend to think that the majority of the hands that call Coxlover there have him beat by more than 56-42.. He was semi-short stacked at around 7xBB and was aggressively trying to make the final table. He succeeded in doing this. It was not the worst play ever and when the hands were turned over he had to be feeling good. While I am not glad he made the money I had a great time playing with him and it was a fun tourney.

I played a masterful game at the blogger tourney. The only race situation I was in the whole game was the one with Sox. I played post flop for the most part and while I did make some mistakes against CC I think this was one of my best games ever. I appreciate Pauly coming by afterwards and congratulating me for playing so well against a tough field. I had a great chat with Joachiam about all kinds of poker. In general it was a hell of a lot of fun to play face to face with the people I have seen as Frogs, Nurse’s and Monkeys for the past few months. Sox I still see as a fish. Even though the close but not quite enough theme would continue on this weekend I would not trade it for anything. My second live MTT experience was awesome and hopefully it will lead to some bigger and better things.

Next Up: Waffles Rants about Electronic Poker Dealers AKA Someone better call Poker Tek Before I post this AKA Ok It is not that bad

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


Let us see where did I leave you.. Ah yes, I was busy spilling beer down the back of Kats hot leather sleeveless dress and being fondled by all manor of model level blogger chicks.. at least that is what my delusional mind says and I am sticking with it.

Finally Iggy decides he wants to go over to the IP. So we round up some players and head on down. Carmen, Maigrey, April, Bobby, Derek, Grubby, Gary, Daddy.. many more people decide to go on down to the IP.

Somehow I end up sitting down at a table of PAI GOW. Now I have never in my life played Pai Gow but I have read many columns from various experts and I think the only real thing you have to do is yell PAIIIIIIIII GOWWWWWWW at the top of your lungs as often as possible.

I started up immediately screwing up as I touched the cards before I was supposed to. All of the cards MUST be dealt before you are allowed to even touch them. I never knew this. Now normally this would not be so bad but the dealer gave me an evil look. I think her name was Bock Choi or something like that. She was actually just funning with me and was a riot. I loved Bock Choi!!!! She was awesome. All I really remember about the game was yelling Pai Gow!!! at random intervals. You see I did not know a Pai Gow was when the DEALER could not make a hand. SO without this important knowledge I was left with just yelling Pai Gow at random times and hoping it made sense.

After a while I was down a few bucks and everyone called final hand. They all wanted to go play even more –EV games so I put my remaining $55 of my original $100 down and shoot to double up or die. I ended up getting trips and high card on a dealer Pai Gow and was up about ten bucks. The big winner I think was Maigrey. She knew her Pai Gow man!

Blackjack has always been a horrible game for me. I love playing it but I just never win unless I count which believe me I was in no condition to even attempt. I did however get to yell PAI GOW!!! at the top of my lungs several times. This would be a recurring theme for the rest of the trip.

It was hilarious watching Bobby Bracelet play Blackjack though! That guy knows how to play the game. He starts off by paying the dealer to bust. “Cmon Baby! Five bucks to you if you bust!”.. however the funniest moment of the night was him and Maigrey explaining what a pigs nuts look like.. complete with hand fondling action. Seeing those two fondling an imaginary pig’s nuts to explain to the ninety year old female dealer why they look like eights... AND THEN having the eight they were calling for come was priceless.

I quickly gave back my Pai Gow winnings in black jack and wandered around a bit more. I went to the bar and chatted a bit with Iggy. If you have not been to the bar at the IP you are missing some weird shit. The decked out pimps and hoes there are funny as hell. Not to mention that crazy bastard Daddy was there! If you think I am crazy I have NOTHING on Daddy. He is the king of the nut jobs and I bow to him. Although I admit I did not get any hooker action it was a blast.

I finally caught back up to Carmen. She says she left me three nasty messages for leaving her alone at the IP. I can not wait to hear them! Nothing better than a sexy woman swearing at you!!! WOO HOO! I better get my phone on the charger. Of course I did not abandon her. I would never leave Carmen alone at a bar. I love that girl!!! The thought is just inconceivable.

Around 9AM in the morning we finally decided to leave. Actually the bartender was being a total shit head and yelled at Carmen for kneeling on a bar stool… hellllllooooo? I hate when bartenders are morons. Serve the beer. Be nice. Make tips. Carmen was nice enough to offer me a ride back to Dons. We took a cab to her place first so she could freshen up for her afternoon plans. I was feeling a little ill by this time with a gut full of SoCo and Beer. It felt like the SoCo was trying to drill its way out of my stomach.. So I lay down on Carmen’s bed and got to sleep for a whole hour. Wow. Sleeping where she sleeps.. That might have been the highlight of my trip. So we end the first day in Vegas with me somewhat peacefully slumbering away at the goddesses crib with about four hours until the WPBT main event started.

Next Entry: CoxLovers Revenge

Monday, December 11, 2006

Weekend with the Brethren: Part I

I had a great time this trip. It was –EV in expected cash value but it was far more +EV in hanging with people who I think are exceptional. I wanted to focus on the people side of the trip this time. During my last trip I got caught up in all the pokering it being like the 3rd time I had ever played live and my first ever MTT. I decided I would not do that this time and ended up not even touching poker cards for my entire first day.

So what did I do? I had the chance to shoot down a shot of SoCo with Big Al! What a cool guy. I apparently semi-blew him off last time I was here.. as we basically waved to each other on my first night. Not this time. I got to get some time with the long haired hippy. He is not as fat as I thought he would be.

I finally met so many people I had been dieing to see. Gary "Tighty Whitie" Cox was a hell of a lot of fun. Even if his girlie pigtail made me a little uneasy at first.. once he explained that his daughter forced it upon him I felt a lot more comfortable. Gary is a real great guy to hang out with and if you have not partied with him you are missing a ton.

I got to catch up with Veneno, Kitty and the Garthmeister. Kitty and I lamented our good friend from across the world not being there for about ten seconds!!! You were missed. I even flashed a few bloggers with my boxers. Hey! It’s like shorts! Calm down! I hung with the Dwarven sellout as he held court at the MGM bar and then some… I think I saw Dr. Pauly for a few minutes.. he needed to make the rounds ya know. I re-met Change100 again.

Spent a ton of time hovering between the two best cleavages in the Blogger world. I have to say though their personalities outshine what they look like any day of the week. I got to have some great one-on-one time with both of these ladies and they are really special. Congrats on your news too Elfie!

I met "Scary Lady" who is just sooooooooooo awesome. I told her she did not look much like her picture.. but she looks a lot better IMHO. I had a great time with her.

I told off some Jar Heads. Hey, it is not like it was a platoon of them or anything? One of the Jar heads was annoying someone so I asked him if he had someone to shoot or something. Apparently your not supposed to wise off to Jar Heads. Who knew? I really should not be allowed to drink. Think what you read here everyday .. then take ALL OF THE FILTERS OFF. That is me when I drink.

I got to spend a bunch of time with my old friend from Texas (but we will not hold that against her) April. She who gives up a ton of her time that could be spent darning her socks or organizing her underwear draw to get these shin digs all setup. I suppose we should thank her or something?

I would have hung out with Ick but I am starting to think he was a figment of our imaginations.. a group delusion created by us bloggers so we could have an iconic pretty boy figure who played a mean MTT. I think there must be some Freudian reason that we imagined him.. I still miss his tight little ass though. Actually he was held up by work. If he had called me for about ten seconds I could have given him some links on how to kill an old guy who is better off dead and make it look like an accident. Such simple problems if you just think things through. However I guess he has to follow his own path.

So many other people I spoke with .. and this is just night one people. Bobby the Thrice Confirmed, Marge.. So much fun just kicking back in the bar and getting to know these people a little better. We are only up to like 2AM on the first night here people. Much more to come.

I did feel like a B-Level semi-celeb starlet though as I was Licked, had my Ass Pinched, had my hair stroked, my beard scratched and had a few offers to watch some hot girl-on-girl lesbian action. Now if I was an A-Level blogger celeb I would have gotten my junk confirmed and had a room key stuck down my pants. I guess it gives me something to shoot for next time. No I will not tell who did what to me.. it is not conducive to getting groped the next time.. so stop begging and get your own blog.


Thursday, December 07, 2006

Live Blogging Preperations for Vegas

Thursday December 7th, 2006

6:30PM ... Come home after procrastinating for the whole week about getting anything done. Eat Dinner. Get ready to pack.

6:32PM ... Fall fast asleep.

10:00PM ... Wake up.

10:50PM ... Move. Get backpack out of room. Drink coke. Realize I have no clean clothes. Put Jeans, Polo Shirts, T-Shirts in Wash. Large Load. Heavy. Fast. One cup of Tide.

10:58PM ... Decide it would be smart to live blog instead of pack. Answer emails. Fire up Full Tilt.

11:04 ... See Full Tilt has added HORSE, HA, and HOSE Mixed games. No ARSE?

11:53 ... Increased my amazing ROI in 6-MAX SNGs. Is it really 11:53? Nothing packed yet.

12:04 ... Scooby Doo Boxers in the wash. Am I slow or is it just me?

12:13 ... Printed out Travel Itinirary and Blogger Cell Numbers. Highlighted Carmens number even though it is in my Cell Phone.

12:26 ... Printed all Directions out to Airport. Leaving myself 2 hours to go 47 miles.. Might not be enough time. It is 6PM rush hour traffic. I may just have to ask my boss if I can bail at lunch.. then enjoy a nice stress free book in the airport lobby.. mmmm.. nice..

1:25AM ... Did I really lose 10$ in Razz and HORSE. yuck. Packed only my itinerary so far.. No more progress yet.

2:21AM ... Started the drying box.

2:53AM ... Shit, Why did I start this STUD MTT. I am 1 of 20 right now.. and I have had a few amusing spots.

SirFWALGMan: i had a perfectly good low draw
SirFWALGMan: I wont appologize for that
ebonyrose: oh you all do
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: its stud hi-lo donk
SirFWALGMan: not just hi

bjb305 (Observer): NICE HAND YOU LUCKY
SirFWALGMan: haha
SirFWALGMan: thanks

3:43 ... ITM.

3:54 .. 4 left. Will this never end?

4:23 .. 3 left. Obviously not.

4:30 .. Not sure that was worth 3rd place money.

Thursday December 8th, 2006

2:26PM .. In 45 minutes I get naked in my work bathroom and then it is off to Vegas! WOO HOO! I am sooooo excited I just cant hide it! I'm about to lose control and I think I like it! Ok that went Ghey way too quick.

Paid Review: Cardroom Supply, Inc.

The following is a paid review for

Cardroom Supply Inc.. Interesting review for me to tackle. Apparently my last post about how I probably was not going to get any more reviews was a bit pre-mature. So how do you go about reviewing a site you have never used?

First off I spent some time searching the intertubes trying to find out if anyone had posted any horror stories on the place. I was happy that I was unable to find any negative experiences with this retailer. I did find a few local forum reviews with overall positive experiences. In addition they have a top service rating with Yahoo! and accept PayPal as a purchasing method which will help if you have any disputes.

Prices seemed average for the site. I did not notice any "Fantastically" low prices but everything seemed in line with what you should pay. The fact that they handle the shipping for anything over $100 is an added bonus also.

I was fine with the interface and the use of Yahoo! for backend merchant processing. The layout made it a click away for me to find anything I needed. If I should so need something. It was clean and easy to get to. The selection could be larger since it is online but it was adequate for finding most anything you might want.

I have really only bought Poker books in my long and historic poker career and so I can not say I will suddenly go out and buy something from this site. If you are into hosting home games and the like it seems worth checking out. If they send me any free sample *hint* *hint* I would be glad to comment on the quality of the products they ship and in general about my experiences with the site. Until then all I can say is I could not find any reason to not use them.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

SNG Goodness

Is a 137% ROI Sustainable? It seems to be.. lol. Ah well.. We can only do our best, right?

Turbo Razz is Spiiiiceeyyyyyy

I have no idea what the fuck that mean.

The First Mookie was suck as I was HU in an SNG and could not focus. I allowed myself to lose 2/3 of my chips then with my final $500 I push.. and of course KQ calls me.. AND of course my AK loses. I think 80% is overrated. Let the ranting begin. Oh wait I did that earlier.

I did take first in the Turbo Razz MTT.. While I did play well.. and I did take a page from Lucko's book and bully the table when I had a huge lead.. I also got extremely lucky. I can not think of one hand where I got badly sucked out on. In Razz that is AMAZING. I even sucked out a little bit when I took Slb out..

Of course I was a gracious winner as always.

xkm1245 (Observer): i should have won, right?
SirFWALGMan (Observer): no
SirFWALGMan (Observer): i am better
SirFWALGMan (Observer): and I had a lead

I am evil. I admit it. Actually in reality I am just highly excitable. When I win a hand I am flying high and happy and ready to rule the world.. and when I lose one I get depressed and either rant or cry. Depending on the day. If I have offended anyone well tough luck. I think being excited by something in life is not the worst thing in the world. If you take things too seriously then that is your problem not mine.

... three ...

.. more days ..

Rebuilding the roll for the umpteenth time I have been delving into SNGs. I think these are really the fastest way to build up a roll from scratch. I never really thought I would like 6-Max SNGs. I am not a short table player. I do not like two places paying. However I found them to be interesting.

Number Played: 4
Finishes: 1,1,2,5
ROI: 127%ish?

I dunno.. I have never been good at math. Anyway.. they seemed like pretty good games. I liked that they were quick. I liked that in one of them 3-people went out on the first hand. I liked the fact that first place in a 6-MAX pays just about the same as first place in a full table.

I like the fact that the second place I took was when I went all in A9 vs A5 HU. I have no idea what happened with the 5th place finish.. but I assume I will have some amount of out of the money finishes. I also like the fact that the blinds did not increase very fast but the monkeys thought they had to move quickly. I think people were patient in only one of these things. In that one I did a lot of stealing of blinds which was good because I lost a HUGE pot when my AT was creamed by 9To. Ouch. AT least the fucker was short. I was able to regain my dominant chip lead and bust that guy in second.

I have not given up on the multi-table SNGs. I think those are worthwhile also.. but I may play 3-4 6-MAX a night and then if I do well do a multi. See if I can keep a good run going. I was also told that the LHE SNGs were pretty sweet and I need to give those a shot. Guys like SNG Machine and Poker Enthusiast seem to do well with these so why not.

I actually had Fastpitch watching me the other night which was fun. It is always nice to get some feedback on how you played a game.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


Man am I hyper today.. maybe it is because the Coke machine is out and I am stuck with Diet Coke.. Less sugar makes more caffeine effect? Not sure.. So I was playing a 1$ HORSE SNG last night. Why? I figured I needed practice to play Hoy in the mixed games and that level of player is probably around his skill if not a little higher.

Actually the real reason for this post.. No trashing Hoy is not good enough.. Well it is but that is besides the point. The REAL reason for this post is to announce a new contest. I am not sure what the prize will be but this is about an idea our newly deceast brother Ick. What? He is still around? Prove it!

He mentioned a while ago that I should come up with the "Essential Waffles" an intro guide to my blog.. Something that contains posts that make me.. well.. special. That could be used in either the traditional or short bus meaning and be equally applicable. Anyways.. I would choose what the essential Waffles is except I am not sure that I would pick the best reads. So I am counting on you my friends. Over the next month I please post your suggestions in comments. I will also post a few I think are good.. we can all vote and have fun and see which posts we like the most. The winners will go on the sidebar as "The Essential Waffles".. perhaps credit will be given to those who find the good ones. You have 3 years of material to comb through. You should be able to find something..

The Blog Search feature only goes back so far so you will really have to work at it. July 2006 is good for my first Blogger meeting in Vegas.. November 2005.. meeting Dr. Pauly for the first time.. Early 2005 is when I lost my biggest and best Bankroll.. Many many other "interesting posts".. if you want the one where my Wife kicked me out of the house for a little while your gonna have to find that one yourself. Anyway.. good luck with the scavenger search should be interesting at least..


Mucho thanks to Trauma for showing me just how much I own Chip! You remember my good buddy Chip! We started out ranting against each other in that Razz MTT and then became buddies towards the end. He ended up finishing up first which was nice. HOWEVER whenever ANYONE Googles his name from now until eternity what will they see? His great accomplishments? His MTT wins? Nope. MY BLOG ENTRY! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry Chip but I P@WN you!


Err.. I found this to be interesting I guess. There is some "You can be a winner too!" email from some guy named Roy. Kipper says he is full of shit but has some good stuff on occasion.

So I decided to read some testimonials.. Just cause I am bored and this is what I do.

Hey Roy: You are ruining my sleep!

Since I got your email about tips for winning "Sit and Go" online tournaments � I stay up all night playing. Five tournaments in two nights, I was "in the money" all five times. (2 FIRST PLACE)!

Ummm.. Are you a fucking retard? You can only get through 5 SNGs in two nights? What the hell does Roy tell you to do to win? Just timeout every single hand until everyone gets wicked pissed and fucking quits. I think this might work! Good Job Roy!

Next comes the chick I like to call "Could possibly be hot in a nerdy way if she showed me some cleavage". I guess she could f my ass with that huge nose of hers. That would be a first. Anyway here is what this Genius has to say:

I play NL home games and tourneys and am in the money/points nearly every time I play now. For example, a couple of weeks ago, I played in a tournament at a local bar. There were 7 full tables - I won first.

Geee.. thanks Roy! I am now better than 35 sloshed guys who just want to get into my panties instead of winning this MTT.. Oh yeah, and I can beat my friends who are more retarded than I am. Your the best Roy!

Your tips newsletter has bought my game along immeasurably

Ummmm. I hate to be a DuggleBooger but I think you misspelled something. kudos to the Genius Roy who invented this system that makes such smart people able to win more than they normally would.. Hell this guys saved years of losing by getting the news letter.

Anyways.. I could keep ragging on these retards but my ears are starting to bleed. Hope this was as amusing to you as it was to me. Oh yeah, and Roy, I have excellent advertising rates!

Monday, December 04, 2006

I remember now..

BG wrote up a really good counterpoint to the Reviewme ad revenue. In essence he was saying the reason he will not be using the service is because it undercuts other bloggers revenue. I have totally different feelings about this myself.

First off I may end up not using Reviewme anyways because I do have one essential issue with it. It allows someone to tell me what to write about. Now the professional writers among us are used to this. However in RadioFree Wafflesville this is a new concept. I am not sure if I want to give up even that small amount of freedom.

I am not sure I will get any ad review from Reviewme anyways. The reason for this is I think it will probably favor the less popular blogs for the time being. If you can get 2-3 ads for the price you would have to pay for my *elite* (snicker, I cant even say that with a straight face) blog then I assume many of the people using this service would feel the money better spent on smaller blogs.

I also do not think that if an Advertising used a Reviewme method to get an Ad they would rule out other types of Ads. It is in the best interest of these people to get as much exposure as they can. Face it the rates we get for these Ads are nothing to a business. These places can and do use many different mediums and will continue to do so.

I think the idea that using a service like this steals from the potential ad revenue of other bloggers is just not a genuine point. Here is why. I do not ask Iggy or Maudie what they make for an Ad.. They have never done anything to help me get advertising. I feel like they are good friends and any advertising I do is my business separate from that. We are all out there by ourselves. I know for a fact I have gotten more money than other blogs for certain ads and that is just business. I am sure I get a hell of a lot less than an Ad on one of the A-List blogs. In a capital system like this it is everyone for themselves. For the good or the bad we have to accept this.

Now.. If we as bloggers decided to form a coalition of Blog advertisers and set rates for all of our members based on rules that the group decided on. If we refused to allow any advertiser that did business outside of our group. If we formed a union of bloggers who all worked together to get each other ad revenue and set the rates for our group that would be one thing. I would join and definitely not be a scab but until that happens get what you can.

I forgetted

I had some other cool post I was going to write up.. It might hit me again later.. See this is why I post quickly and often and never shut up during conversations.. If I do not then my brilliance may be lost forever to the Alzie like sponge my brain is becoming.. Oh well.. Until I remember I leave you with this..

hey, i need the number to your handymen. j will call you tomorrow. thanks!
- Rabia

Ick has handy men huh? What are they handy for my friend? I thought so... TOTALLY GHEY! Probably why I have yet to see his wife's picture.. can you say "Drag Queen?".. It is always the pretty ones..


The Future of Blogs

I think the demise of blogs is highly over estimated.

Not every blog has mad writing skillz behind it. We all can not be Dr. Pauly, Iggy or AlCantHang.. However in essence these are not who we should be. I read there blogs and enjoy the writing style.. I feel I can laugh with Al's mad antics or sympathize with his liver and get the latest poker news from an Iggy Uber post or be amazed at how a drugged up super hipster like Pauly can wring so much meaning out of the English language. These guys are not why I blog though.

The blogs that inspire me to keep going are the ones I can relate to. Perhaps a guy writes about having a bad day or tilting off some funds or grinding away at the kiddie tables. He may not have the flair of a lot of writers out there but I can relate to his experiences. I feel like I am not alone out there. I know other people blow bankrolls or struggle with the game. I know I am not the only one who has sucky days. Our struggles are shared and that is the essence of what life is about.

It is really what we are all looking for in one way or another.

It will be great to meet more of you in the annual pilgrimage to the Mecca city of Vegas. Catching up with old friends. Enjoying a few beers. Traveling 5000 miles over a weekend is not a hell of a lot of fun but it is so worth connecting with people on a different level. Putting faces to the nameless comments and endless girlie chats. I will be flying in around midnight on Friday night.. It seems like the place to meet is the MGM with festivities trickling off to other parts later.. You know your dead money when so many Poker players MUST have you there. Looking forward to it!! Until Friday.

Sunday, December 03, 2006


Poker is annoying me. Yeah sure I have made 4 final tables in the past week in three different games but who cares. I am tired. I need a break. So I probably will not be playing until I land in Vegas on Friday.

I did have fun in the Razz MTT though.. First I started off meeting a good friend named chip:

Dealer: SirFWALGMan wins the pot (1,550) with
Dealer: Hand #1344754202
GiveMeUrCh1ps: wut in god's name?
GiveMeUrCh1ps: who makes that call?
SirFWALGMan: i felt you were full of crap
GiveMeUrCh1ps: do u know how to play?
SirFWALGMan: so I called
GiveMeUrCh1ps: ROFL
GiveMeUrCh1ps: with a 10 high
GiveMeUrCh1ps: omg
GiveMeUrCh1ps: omg

I stand by my play. I knew he was full of crap. heh. Right chip?

SirFWALGMan: you had a Q high
GiveMeUrCh1ps: someone shoot me
SirFWALGMan: thanks for the donation
GiveMeUrCh1ps: the chances of u having me
beat even if i was bluffing are still low
SirFWALGMan: if you had 1 bad card behind
SirFWALGMan: I was against a Q high
SirFWALGMan: so I went with my read and you
lose moron
GiveMeUrCh1ps: right
SirFWALGMan: period
SirFWALGMan: if there is a point in that hand you
were ahead please show me
fastpitch27 (Observer): nice hand waffles
SirFWALGMan: cause I dont see it
SirFWALGMan: lol bluff some more chips off donk
GiveMeUrCh1ps: alright

GiveMeUrCh1ps: learn to play the game
SirFWALGMan: part of playing the game is
knowing when someone is blufifng
GiveMeUrCh1ps: u didnt know
SirFWALGMan: you can never KNOW
GiveMeUrCh1ps: ur just a donk that calls nething
and i didnt know
SirFWALGMan: but that shouldnt stop you
SirFWALGMan: lol do not laugh at what is beyond
your ability to comprehend
SirFWALGMan: think of it like I am your dad, and
your the kid, and you cant understand why I wont
let you ride your bike in the street
SirFWALGMan: cause thats a good comparison
GiveMeUrCh1ps: do u think ur better at poker than
SirFWALGMan: absolutly
SirFWALGMan: why would I play if I didnt think I
was better than you?
GiveMeUrCh1ps: go to google type in my
username and you'll change ur mind
GiveMeUrCh1ps: donk
GiveMeUrCh1ps: i've won more off poker in 3
months on this site than ull make off poker ur
whole life
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: in 10$ MTTs
SirFWALGMan: lol
GiveMeUrCh1ps: nope
SirFWALGMan: u must be donald trump
GiveMeUrCh1ps: signed up bcuzz a friend was in it
SirFWALGMan: nows when you tell me you usually
play 200/400 NL and you want to challenge me
GiveMeUrCh1ps: i dont play 200/400 NL
SirFWALGMan: dude you might be good at poker
or might not be.. but your attitude is wrong..

Ok... So I have been known to have a bad attitude at times myself.. hmm.. Anyway me and chip kissed and made up and met up at the final table. I ended up going out in 6th with a weak hand but one I knew each time I bet I was ahead.. unfortunately my opponent caught up when it was no longer an option to fold. Oh well.

JJ went deep also until he tried to outdraw a calling station. It was a mistake probably.. He was soooooooooo mad. HA! So in order to calm him down so he did not turn green and like break something I had to take his donk out. It was really funny. I had a good starting hand but the donk had me crushered when the money went in.. fortunately for me and JJ he trippled paired and hit some big cards. I was able to knock him out before the money. You are welcome JJ.

I tend to piss people off it appears as a little while later I got into a hand with Bubba and he was none too happy. I was showing a AK2 board which was behind his made eight low. HOWEVER I had a 36 behind and KNEW if I hit a card he was done.. So instead of meekly calling him down and letting us both see cards cheap I raise him with a K high.. I finally make him fold when I hit my low on the next card.

SirFWALGMan: bring it
bob65: what a tool
SirFWALGMan: cmon
Dealer: bob65 has 15 seconds left to act
SirFWALGMan: your done
SirFWALGMan: put a fork in you
Dealer: SirFWALGMan wins the pot (10,900)
Dealer: Hand #1345125813
SirFWALGMan: ya im a tool and you lost
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: people call me names all the time
chip, whats up with that?
Nacoma: good names ?
SirFWALGMan: no
SirFWALGMan: things like donkey
SirFWALGMan: and tool
SirFWALGMan: and moron
SirFWALGMan: and it really hurts my feelings to
keep taking there chips
GiveMeUrCh1ps (Observer): nh
GiveMeUrCh1ps (Observer): keep knocking them
SirFWALGMan: im trying
tourney9000: full house lol
SirFWALGMan: Bobo deserved it
SirFWALGMan: good check down
GiveMeUrCh1ps (Observer): 2 moe till final
bob65 (Observer): i deserved it huh, why's that?
SirFWALGMan: call me a tool
SirFWALGMan: call me names I take no mercy
bob65 (Observer): well you are you reraised me
with the worst hand
SirFWALGMan: lol and your sitting on your azz
cause you dont know how to play
bob65 (Observer): right mron
SirFWALGMan: dumb azz
bob65 (Observer): how the %#!$ am i dumb, when
you're the one who reraises with the worst
#@&@ing hand
SirFWALGMan: i had a245 behind dude
SirFWALGMan: what you want me to fold?
bob65 (Observer): you had nothing you had k-low
SirFWALGMan: you so stupid
SirFWALGMan: i had a draw that was so much
better than whatever you had made it was worth
SirFWALGMan: and it won
SirFWALGMan: and you lost
SirFWALGMan: so go cry to mommy
SirFWALGMan: cya next week

Ah.. there are some things I like about Online Poker.. *sigh*. Oh yeah and go look up my new buddy chip in Google.. he has won a few things lately.. very nice Chipper very nice.