Friday, March 31, 2006

Hi-Ho Hi-Ho Its off to Poker we go!

I recently had conversation with another blogger who was asking the age old question - Is the Blog Father a vertically challenged individual.

[20:00] SirFWALGMan: Im gonna smack down one little person when I see him
[20:00] victim: he is not a dwarf
[20:01] SirFWALGMan: he is
[20:01] victim: nope
[20:02] SirFWALGMan: yup
[20:02] SirFWALGMan: don't let him fool you
[20:03] victim: who has seen him?
[20:03] SirFWALGMan: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm
[20:03] SirFWALGMan: Sleepy, Grumpy and Doc
[20:03] victim: its a lie
[20:04] SirFWALGMan: Sneezy too!
[20:04] victim: ask him
[20:04] SirFWALGMan: he's not on
[20:04] victim: inside joke
[20:05] SirFWALGMan: oh yeah, just with you and him?
[20:05] victim: when he is
[20:06] victim: ask him
[20:06] SirFWALGMan: Vertically challenged
[20:07] SirFWALGMan: listen
[20:07] SirFWALGMan: me and iggy are tight
[20:07] SirFWALGMan: and I say he is the 8th dwarf
[20:08] victim: nope y was he gonna hire a dwarf
[20:08] SirFWALGMan: Poker Dwarf, they don't talk about him much

Thursday, March 30, 2006


Had a nice night at 2/4 and then gave it all back. Except 5 bucks. It was nice being up over sixty for a little while. Oh well. What can you do when you raise pre-flop with AJ, flop and Ace, and QQ catches a flush on the river to beat your J high flush. I am not sure. What can you do when your two pair get capped by some tool with a pair of sixes and then he turns another one? With the only card that does not give you a boat? I am not sure. What can you do when 78d calls your pre-flop raise and post-flop bet with JJ along with A5? At least I folded that one when the flush hit. Third place feels good. Oh well I guess a winning night is better than a losing one. I guess all you can do is call the whole table morons and try again tomorrow.

I have a goal. I want to play enough poker in the next two months to get my bankroll up to 5K. It is a little pie-in-the-sky kind of goal but I am going to try it. If I am able to do so I am going to take 2K out for Vegas baby! I would also like to win the WSOP seat then I do not need to make as much. Better luck tomorrow I guess.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

ZeeJustin Tries Again

Zee Justin has tried the apology thing again. I sort of think he should quit while he is behind. He is just not very good at apologizing.

At that time, I unfortunately did not realize that what I was doing was unethical. For starters, many of the poker players that I have learned from were using the same practice. This obviously doesn’t make it ok, but I wasn’t questioning it at the time. Until recently; this wasn’t a well hidden fact. People seemed to accept it as ok and talked about it in the open.

Ummm.. Bullshit? You did not think it was UNETHICAL to have five shots at a tourney instead of one? I guess maybe you were brought up by bad parents or something cause cheating is obvious and I have a hard time beleiving you did not know this was wrong. Just be honest: Everyone else was doing it so I wanted an advantage too.

Anyway, I am not going to harp on this. I am not sure he should be stigmatized for the rest of his life but he probably will be. Poker players do not like cheaters. Hell, they do not even like whiners or people who take there chips to the bathroom with them. I wish him good luck in the future and I hope he does learn a lesson from this. It just seems hard to beleive that he really feels like what he did was wrong. It looks more like his PR guy said "Say this Zee, it will sound good". I do hope he means it when he says he is done with cheating. Only time will tell. He is a damn good player and I wish I had half the skill he has but I guess I will just have to live with 100x the integrity.


Ok, enough about other people, it is ALL ABOUT THE WAFFLES. I have been TOTALLY emjoying myself on the LHE tables. OMG! I just got a promotion to TAP from Poker Tracker! See I am not loose! Now if I could only work on that post-flop game. Ahh, why ruin a good thing.

So over a short period of time and very few hands it looks as if I am getting back into it. I have 5/BB-100 in the 1/2 game and 10/BB-100 in the 2/4 game. Not too shabby. It will obviously fall back to something around 1-3/BB-100 over time. I have not felt outplayed in these games. I have scaled back on any kind of tricky moves. I also will not go to war or call down second pairs more than once. I do like to sometimes call down a hand to see what my opponent was raising with. It totally frustrates them when I river my trips too.

My VP$IP dropped to 18.78 which I guess is tight, where 18.9 is Slightly Loose. Go figure. I am not ready to play alot of 2/4 but I figure I should play a little bit to get used to the game. I buyin short for $40 which gives me a perfect stop-loss figure. It also makes me alot less nervous. I am not sure why $80 makes me nervous. It never did the first time I played this game. Oh well. We will have to wait a little for that to go away.

The bankroll is at a semi-healthy 999.61. The Poker gods are taunting me and telling me to stop looking at the bankroll all the time. It can only get one into trouble. I agree. These are some of my biggest issues. Oh well. I think I am getting slightly better at the whole sphere that is poker and only time will tell. I like grinding. It suits me well. Even though I am aggressive as hell in NLHE, I like playing safely in LHE. I think it also could benefit my NLHE game somewhat. I have been getting a little loose on my calling lately.

So anyhoo.. hope it is all going well for you my loyal readers. Until next time: Sir Waffles signing out.

PS: Almost forgot. Be there or be square. I am so playing in this even though it is above my bankroll:

Blogger WSOP Satellite Tourney
PokerStars - Private Tab
April 3rd, 9PM EST
$30 +3 No Limit
Password: socoshot

Katitude: Queen of the Mookie MTT

I often will say nice things about bloggers but this time I really mean it.Katitude is a real poker player. You might ask why I say this? First off I am EXTREMELY proud of how she has done in MANY MANY recent MTTs. Getting to final tables and making the money several times. Tonight she had her first orgasm poker style – First Place in the Mookie MTT! It is her first final table ever. The thing that I think makes her a good player though is her ability to listen and learn. I first met Kat in the WWDN tourneys. I nicknamed her “My ATM” because in almost every game she basically handed me her chips. I probably owe her for several final tables. After I got to know her a little we had a conversation about TPTK. How I felt she overplayed it and how she needed to pay attention to the aggression on the table. I swear she took that conversation to heart. Those few words have increased her skills a hundred fold. It is paying off for her now too. I asked her in tonight’s game what the two biggest improvements in her game were lately. I knew the answer but wanted to hear what she said: “I am more aggressive” and “I have learned to fold”. So true Kat sooooo true! I could not be prouder of her. Everyone go over to her blog and congratulate her on the win. She deserves it. She is a winner, not because of one game, or one week, but because she is a student of the game and is willing to learn and adjust. Let’s all learn something from her example.


AlCantHang is kicking our ass in Frappr. The score stands at 132 (Bribed people) vs 72 (Dedicated Readers of the Highest Quality) so if you have not signed my Frappr map do it now! Just click on the "Click Here" to check out who reads this blog.. and add yourself. On a better note we have a reader from Japan on our map.. AlCantHangInJapan does not! So at least I beat Big Brother in something..


I just feel like saying the word: Intuition. Lately I have made a few bad laydowns because I did not trust my intuition. I think if your playing NLHE (and you have mad intuitive skills) you MUST trust yourself. It is very important. I made a laydown against "The Hammer" in the WWDN that I should not have. It was raised pre-flop, checked post flop, and popped when the hammer would have made an OESD. I said to myself "That smells like the hammer", and even though I would have probably been rivered I think I should have trusted myself and pushed. Intuition is not the same thing as what-the-fuck-I-might-be-good. It is a totally different thing. If you can not tell the difference it might be better to fold. Once you play enough hands of Poker your brain starts telling you things. Listen to it. It is smarter than you are. 'Nuff Said.

Interesting Stuff

I usually see a zillion posts a day from Boogster. He is a day-trading, poker playing, maniac. Actually I assume he does pretty well. I have tried to get him to write a post on what it takes to become a day trader. I am very interested not because I want to do it but because it seems facinating. Sort of like Mystery Shoppers. What happened to that chick anyways?
I hope he takes the bait and posts. I wanted to know: Software-Hardware Requirements, Bankroll Requirements, Educational Requirements, and general stuff. If he does do that posts he is getting the "Blog of the Month" for May. I have another blogger in line for April.


So last night was a frustrating way to win five bucks. The LHE game is running well. Poker Tracker says I am my usual sLA-P biatch player, which won me 3K playing the game over a year ago so I guess I can deal. I do not know how I got an sL rating btw, because I play shizzz-azzz-tight. I mean when the 1/2 Players FOLD to your raises PRE-FLOP, you know your a tight-azzz-biatch.

I went out before the first break in the WWDN. I played my AK REALLY hard pre-flop and it just never made it. I got called for a HUGE all-in by pocket 4's and those sailboats cruised away with any chance I had of winning this week. Not how I would play sailboats but to each there own. I do think a better line on that hand for me might have been calling his raise and then pushing the flop. I have no idea of he would have any ability to fold pocket 4's post flop with three overs on the board but we can always hope. I really can not beat myself up for this play. I may have gone a little too hard with my hand but that is the power and peril of AK. Worse case you are usually only a 5-6% dog if someone calls your push. I will take those odds in a tourney early on. If I win that hand I have a huge stack and probably make the final table.

I also lost in a 5$ PLO MTT. I am not sure why I play PLO except that it is fun. I love Omaha and think I could make alot of money playing it but so far something about my game is missing. Oh well.

I then went on to win $40 at one LHE table and lose $20 at another. So all in all I came out a little ahead. I guess that is the best you can expect when grinding. A little every night. I also think I am playing better. Folding marginal hands more often. In NLHE I might try and buy a pot or be a little tricky. In LHE nobody is folding to your one bet so if the pot is small and your hand is iffy it is usually better to fold.

On tonights schedule is some more 1/2 LHE. In addition I am playing in the Mookie Donkey SNG. Last time we got about two tables of donkeys together. Our very own Garthmeister took it home against a super donkey was not able to finish it off HU at the end so had to settle for second.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Grubby Speaks

One of the most eloquent and well spoken posts I have read about ZeeJustin to date. Please go and read it from none other than the Poker Grub!

Big Slick Nuts!: Survey

Personally I never wear a suit for anything. But I am a nerdy programmer with a lengthy resume who hates suits with a passion and would never work anywhere that required a suit (for now). It has been 7 years since I wore a suit on an interview. In your case though I would wear the suit.

Monday, March 27, 2006


Horrible night. I go out second in a 45/SNG, lose a buyin in 1/2 LHE, go out 9th in a 9/SNG and then to top it off I push pre-flop with AAJx s00ted in PLO and get called by K3xx 3 clubs and lose when the flop comes K3. Ouch.

The "A" List

First thoughts about the trip my blogger brothers made this weekend:

Pauly please do not dress up ever again. It has nothing to do with how you look. It just upsets the natural order of the universe and gives me the heabie jeabies.

AlCantHang you rule!

CJ – Your Bunnies were cheating on you! I saw them with several other Douche Bag Bloggers!

Am I sad when I want to hear more about the food than the bunnies?

Congrats you guys! Sounds like you had a blast! Support the Urban Health Institute, who were responsible for getting them into the Mansion in the first place.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Its been a hard days night..

No poker for two days. Jonesing. Especially after I had a nice 2x Buyin LHE game last Thursday. One of my better results in LHE recently. Here is what my life is like. Keep in mind that I am a contractor so I do get paid at least.

Friday. I get handed project-X by my employer. The PM (Project Manager) tells me that we are looking to finish the project by next Friday. Excellent. We have plenty of time.

Friday afternoon. My PM says that they need to have the site live by Monday morning. Ok. We still have the weekend. So Friday night I work real late.

Saturday Morning. The PM now says they want to review the entire site Sunday afternoon. So I play on staying the whole night and finishing the project. In the meantime my daughter comes down with some virus that makes her puke every hour. My wife was up until 2AM Friday night with her. My son wakes up with pains in his abdomen.

So all I can put in on the project Saturday is 12 hours. Sorry. Saturday night I end up staying up all night with my daughter. Luckily my son falls to sleep and soon afterwards we hear “pffffftttttttffffffooooooooooooom”. A huge ball of gas escapes his butt and the pains are no more. My daughter stops puking around 4AM. She is fine now too.

Sunday. I am here with a crazy PM who is trying to get the site done. Looks like I am going to be billing somewhere between 24 and 36 hours for this weekend. I might be bored next week.

Speaking about crazy I think Fluxer went a little insane when Veneno taunted him on his blog. It is a fun read at least. My thoughts on the whole thing: You guys are two different players playing two different games. No way your advice is going to work for each other. It is like Iggy giving a .05/.10 LHE player advice. It just does not roll in that arena. Now can’t we all just get along?

Friday, March 24, 2006

Real Live Poker Content

As some may have noticed by the tone of the Blog I have been a little frustrated lately. Not winning SNGs. Losing a little money. Downswings are tough to deal with. As I said before I am going to give LHE a fair try. I am playing the ½ limit right now and having a good time. I am going to focus on it for at least the next week and see how it goes.

I played a $4/180 SNG tonight to see what they were like. I enjoyed them. I ended up in 27th place which sucks. I got short stacked and tried to take the blind with 78h. I pushed with 3K and an 8K stack thought I was bluffing so he called with KQ. I was bluffing but that is not a call I suggest. On second thought please do make that call every day and twice on Sunday when playing against me. Why did I choose 78h? A lot of limpers. Likely to have two live cards. Two draws possible. It is a much better hand to push with than Ax when you figure the likely calling hands.

I had a really good chat with Iggy tonight about LHE. The thing I like about Iggy is that he UNDERSTANDS why he does things. If I agree with him or not he does not just puke up things he has heard before. He does not defend playing a certain way because he heard Phil Ivey plays that way. He really understands the concepts and math behind the game. I learn a lot every time I speak to that man.

Here are a few more people who have enlightened me with conversations I have had with them. Joanne of A Chip and a Chair fame. She and I were talking about pushing hands and she asked me why I would want to push certain hands when the flop gives me a lot more information about them. A lot of people become pushing monkeys in NLHE and trusting your post-flop play is very important. Learning to beat people at THE GAME and not just pushing all in is the only way to become a better player.

The Film Geek gave me some of my first Tourney advice. It was a lot more detailed but basically he got me thinking about the different stages of a poker game and how your stack should effect how you play. You need to get chips early so you can make moves later so the early stages you want to be a little looser and catch some hands and try and get a lot of chips. You need to be careful playing looser and be willing to let possibly dominated hands go. Once you have chips there is no need to risk them. You want to be tighter and aggressive. Just the idea of playing differently at different points of MTTs opened my eyes to some new ways of playing.

Felicia Lee. She told me I suck at poker and should quit. She also said I should stick to MTTs and SNGs since I was better at that kind of poker. I had never been interested in these types of games and probably would have never started playing MTTs if she did not chide me into it. I also have a lot of motivation to prove her wrong. She actually never said that I could not change so she has outs if I ever become successful but until then I am going to have fun trying to prove her wrong. Of course I could see people interviewing her after I win a WSOP bracelet and her saying "Ya, he sucks at Poker!".. That is what I like about her.

Dr. Pauly. He is just a great guy. I enjoy talking to him and he has always been very supportive of my game. He broke my live game cherry and gave me the advice to play live more often. I have not had a chance to do so but I am going to for sure. He also gave me one of the best books about Poker ever: Phil Gordon’s Little Green Book. I love the book even if Phil is a jerk who would not know funny if a hooters girl hit him in the face with it. Ok I am bitter about the gift certificate.

Finally I have been thinking about my 2+ years as a Poker Player. I think the first year of playing poker was a total waste for me. I was more successful than I had any right to be and it really taught me nothing about poker. The second year was filled with pain and heartbreak. Now that my friends is poker. I went a little insane. Ran with it. Made some decent sized bankrolls and busted them. I got a good feel for the other side of Poker. I am thinking my third year of poker might be when I bring it all together. I may even finally get it. I am a profitable poker player in my third year. Probably about 2cents an hour but it is better than losing. I think bigger and better things are just around the corner.

Thursday, March 23, 2006


To all you Ax chasing CB's I appologize for ranting yesterday. After playing in Mookies tourney and having my AT get called for over half the persons stack with K2 s00ted .. you guys are freaking savants!!!! Of course I lost to K2. So if you have not guessed Poker keeps kicking me in the balls. I especially liked the hand that got me into the position of pushing with ATo again. I make the K9 straight against the AK straight. The AK of course never raised pre-flop and never put a bet in the whole hand even when they had the broadway straight. How do you put someone on AKo in that situation? Well played poker there I guess. I think I finished 7th in the Bird Flu tourney after getting chipped down to nothingness. It is a fun SNG with over twenty people joining this time. The payout for the winner was 120+ I beleive. Our own Garthmeister came in second.

I did actually pull out an amazing suckout though. I was short stacked with three people left to act and had a small pocket pair. I decided what the hell and pushed. I get called by queens and them bitches live up the their name as they get cracked by my fours. See, Poker rewards the donkeys.

I played a HORRIBLE game on Full Tilt and donked off most of my bankroll there. Alot of it to the very same Garthmeister when he flopped the nut flush and people (including myself) just kept pushing more and more money into the pot. It was amusing.

So I took my last twenty and played the PLO8 MTT. Fourty five of the worse O8 players you have ever met joined this game. It started out good as I chipped up to 9K and had a nice shot at winning the thing. I took a few beats when I flopped bottom straight, pushed all in, had people covered, and got called by people with 4 outs to beat me. Of course they got the magic card on the turn every time. The hand that crippled me though was when I had A235 for a low and WAS COUNTERFITED AT THE RIVER. Un-Beleivable. I was resigned to getting quartered until the last card. I would have still been in great shape. In hindsite even though the flop hit me I think it would have been a better play to let my A2 go. Very hard to do when you make the nut low but I need to learn to give it up sometimes. I was able to hold on and finish up in 6th place for a whole $50 (-$10 to deadbeat Trauma because he I traded 20%) profit. I have to say the non-holdem MTTs on Full Tilt are crazy weak. I played Razz and PLO8, two games I freely will admit to sucking to, and placed in the money in both games. A second and a sixth.

The other highlight of my night was when I took my entire cash game buyin, and pushed with AK s000ted. I was hoping for a call. Sort of. I got one. Woo hoo! The person flips up AQo. WOO HOO! I flop two of my S00t WOO HOO! I still lose. Booooo! I for sure have the worse luck of any Poker player out there. I mean I was only a 91% favorite on the flop but you would think I could win one of those coin flips right?

So anyway I am still running frustrated. The Full Tilt games have been fun. If I bust out of Full Tilt I am considering cashing a chunk of bankroll out of Stars and putting it on FT. I do love the 20/2 180SNG and the 45-SNGs on Stars though not to mention the WWND and even the Mookie. Tonights tourney schedule will certainly have a WWDN:West Coast appearance. I love the WWDN. I think I have four cashes so far. However the fun I have is priceless.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

On other fronts...

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Am I stupid? Am I missing something?

First of congrats to me on a fifth place finish in the WWDN. I offered an early sacrifice to the poker gods when I chipped myself down to 300-chips left with the Hammer. I spoke prophetically saying the poker gods would reward my dedication and they did.

Now to the whiny, pussy, I am an asshole, part of my post. Yes I hate bad play and Yes I find it hard to not get mad about it. Twice in the WWDN I got called in the following situations. Please tell me what I am missing here.

I am in EP or Early Middle Position. I am acting before you. I raise 3-4x the blinds, or I push all in. Now immediately you look at your cards. You have A9 or A8 and decide that they are the Shizzz Nuttzles and you either call my all in or re-raise me all in.

I call you and turn over AJ and AT s00ted. I have you totally dominated and you suckout on me. Here is my question. What about a raise from EP-MP tells you that your crap offsuit weak ass kicker hand is any good? I just can not understand this play AT ALL! What are you hoping for? That your only 80% dominated? You think I always have pocket 3’s? I mean what the hell is going through your mind there? Why in the world do people fall in love with weak aces? If someone can explain this in some intelligent manor I might be able to sleep tonight. Otherwise a big CB to you all and your 4 card flushes!

Monday, March 20, 2006


AlCantHang has skyrocketed his map hits by promising illicit musical rewards if you sign his map. Not that I am above blackmail, bribary, and/or massive incentives but I got nothing good to give you. However I do have a request. If you are from Tamil Nadu India and you read this blog.. click on that map link over there and put yourself on it! I want to increase my international standings! I have some England, Germany, Australia in droves, but now lets get India on the map!!! Go Team!

The Plan

Plans are good. I like plans. Planning is nice. So lets review. Stars has been kicking me in the balls. All I have won really in the past month is 2-20$/180SNGs. First and third. Impressive but somewhat empty. So I am going to curtail my actions on stars for a week. Let the feeling that my best hand will never win go away. The bankroll is down to $940 or so. So I am investing only $20 a day on Stars. I will play the 20$/180SNG on M/W/F this week, and the WWDN on T/TH along with some other 10$ event possibly.

Second part of the plan. My Full Tilt bankroll is growing. I am killing the 5$/HORSE SNGs. So I am going to play the 10$/HORSE SNGs, and 5-10$ SNGs or MTTs. See where I can take it. It is sitting at $217 right now so I am going to try and grow it to a working bankroll. I have a nice foothole right now.

So that is the plan for the week. We will see how it rolls.

Now thats Service

Hello Marshall,

Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

We have reviewed this player's chat records and see that they have abused their chat privileges. Their chat abilities have been suspended at this time.

We thank you for your feedback, and wish you the best of luck on the tables. If there is anything else we can assist you with, please let us know.


Team Full Tilt

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Full Tilt Luck

So far I have played four HORSE SNGs and won them all in various finishes and I just took second in this RAZZ MTT doubling my bankroll on stars to over $200. Now I have a nice foothole in which to work. I think I will try some of the 10$ HORSE SNGs and more low buyin MTTs (10$ and less). Wish me luck. Since Stars is kicking me in the junk I hope to have a nice bankroll at a second site.

Only bad part was some guy has 1K in chips. I have like 15K. So I have K23 or some lame hand. However It is cheap for me to call and try and bust him. When I do bust him he follows me around for an hour yelling at me, calling me a gay poor hick, looking up my Stars stats and saying I have only won $500 on Stars (Not true) and that I suck pee pee's and all kinds of crap. I finally reported him to Support.
It was fun for fifteen minutes but cmon get a life.

Did AlCantHang get P@WNED?

Mourn is a fucktard

Picture this. You are a lowly Israelite. Your hanging around this mountain. A guy comes off the mountain, and say “YOU SHALL HAVE NO GODS BEFORE ME!”. Ya Baby! Finally! That cool god who drown all my enemies came down and told me what the hell he wanted to not drown my ass. “Do not take the name of God your Lord in vain!”. Big booming voice. The burning bush told him that. Wow! That must be some good herb! Jesus Christ! I have some rules to follow! Then the guy leaves you hanging.. WHAT THE HELL MOURN! What are the rest of the commandments for 6-MAX LHE PLAY YOU DAMN DONKEY!!!!

Saturday, March 18, 2006


At least I had fun tonight. Stars was dismal as it has been for the past month or so. I just can not catch any lightning. Very sucky. Going to be dipping under 1K again soon.. unless I win something..

However I went to Full Tilt and figured I would try a nice HORSE tourney. Way Fun!! Actually it was an SNG. Lasted about an hour. I won. I assume I am a better general all around player than most of the people playing 5.50 SNGs on FT. Your not lurking are you Felicia?

Some of the highlights were two 3-flush hands in a row that made it. One hit a flush and one back-doored into the straight draw I had. Those hands in the STUD portion of the game accounted for a great deal of my chips.

I outplayed people in Omatard to the extreme. I mean I have no idea what they were calling me with but I SCOOOOPED alot. That was extremely fun. It was also fun to decimate my opponent HU with a 10K vs 1.5K stack in Omaha.

LHE was probably my worse subject of the night. Although I did make some money when it was down to two, I also hit alot of nice hands HU like , 67o, flop 467, guess who had 53o? Ahh well. Lucky I am not overly aggressive I guess.

I really enjoy the HORSE games. I keep looking for the HORSE tourney on FT but I am not sure where or when it is. I keep seeing ones at 4AM which is a wee late. Oh well, most fun I had winning in the past month by far.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Happy St. Micks Day

Happy days to you all. My favorite (only) Irish joke goes as follows.

Q: How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: 2. One to hold the lightbulb and one to drink until the room spins.

Have a nice pint for Ole Sir today!!

Still no luck


Donked off a few bucks on an PLO8 SNG. I raised pre-flop to 1K with AA6x S00ted. I get called by QQ4 hearts with nothing else. The flop comes two hearts. It is the bubble. He calls all his chips off and hits his flush.

Donked off the WWDN to the Venentian. I wa sin the CO and raised KJ 3xBB. The_Venetian goes all in. I know Venentian is a good tough player. I just felt like he might have though I was just trying a blind steal. He flips A8h, at least I have two live cards. Nothing hits and I am out around 20th. Not my best call ever. I think the combination of getting chipped down and being frustrated at not getting any cards got to me here. Ahh well.

Had a nice chip stack going in the 3$ Rebuy too. That was fun. I push it all in with AJ, a jack on the flop. Had not lost a hand until then. I get called by A3 s00ted and QJ. Now the A3 s00ted actually had GREAT odds to call because he had a straight and flush draw with two cards to go. However the QJo had a shit hand and I should have beaten him at least. Of course the turn is a Q and the river is a club at which time I decide to quit for the night.

Fuck Poker for tonight.

Thursday, March 16, 2006


I am in a rut. It seems like I am stuck at the 1100-1400 range of bankroll. I know I should not be complaining but I would like to see some upward growth. I know I am an impatient bastard. So what. SNGs still are not really clicking. I did win the Mookie Award last night and will have the tourney named after me next week "Bird Flue and Waffles". Umm, thanks. Not sure where the LHE game is right now. Getting into the feel of it again I guess. Case of the Monday dolldrums? (I know it is Thursday but I have not worked all week). Not sure. Oh well. I guess I do not feel like my game is growing today.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Joke for Al

Q: What do Philadelphians put on there Pretzels?
A: Jersey Girls!

Speaking of jokes, I just do not get people kicking Poker Champ around. I dunno. I just do not get too offended by immature behavior from childish people. They just do not know any better and yelling at them never helps. While I agree there has not been any earth shatering poker in his posts they have been fine. Ah well. Carry on yelling at him daily. It probably keeps his hit count up anyways.

Mookie Champion

It was a fun game as usual. First was nice too. Thanks Mookie! Damn though, for an eighteen person game it takes a LONG TIME for these tight asses to get knocked out. It was fun playing with Kat as always! I forgot to congradulate her on placing in the WWDN the other night. I am sick with the bird flue still. Better posts later.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Still Sick.. Bah!

This is totally getting annoying. I can sit up for a few hours. I then get sweaty and sick feeling and have to sit down. I was able to sit into 8th place in a PLO tourney today on Stars. That was fun. Not a huge profit but I enjoyed it. I went out when I had about 5xBB and saw AKQ. Hey three big cards why not. I was unfortionatly up against AAxx and AAxx held up. Barely. I had dem outs baby. Thanks for sweating me while I was sweating Kat.

The cold is effecting my blogging too. I mean I totally forgot the best part about the DADI last night: Busting Weak Player. Ohh.. It tasted so good. I set the trap by raising my AA about 6x the blinds when I usually only raise about 3x. I knew a fierce preditor like Weak would sense my weakness and pounce. Luckily he had a nice hand of TT and pushed me all in. I chuckled all the way to the bank. BWAHAHAHA! It was a fun time. I always enjoy taking out players who I know.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Waiting for the wind..

Nothing much. Still Sick. Went to the doctor. I do not get the robe thing. I mean this is one of a small group of women who have touched my naked balls. Whats up with the gown? We are tight are we not? Man is my doctor a babe though. Hot asian lady. She gave my lymphnodes a massage today. Ok, well, she was just checking if they were swollen, man was she checking the wrong node. I love a woman with strong hands.

Poker has been on the downward variance spiral. I jumped back to 1/2LHE and still playing SNGs, etc.. Played in the DADII. Was low stacked. Raised 600 of my 2K pre- with KT s00ted and got re-raised all in. I felt I had to call. He flips up KK. Ouch. Flop comes a nice Txx two spades. So I have all kinds of outs. I make none of them. I am out in 18th or so. Coughing all the way.

It is the hardest part of poker to wait for the winds to lift your sail again and ride variance way up.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Still Sick..

My chest started feeling really painful. I sat up in pain clutching my chest. Sitting there for fifteen minutes alone with nobody home. I suddenly started getting dizzy. I ran to the bathroom. Chest pounding. Room Spinning. I sat down and prayed to the porcelain gods sure that I was going to die. The other side of me decided it wanted to make the offering instead. So I throw down my sponge bob jimmies and scoobie doo boxers and give my offering. Still dizzy I collapse on the nice, cool, floor, and just lay there for a while thinking "This is totally not the way I want to be found dead". In hindsight I think I just got mega dehydrated from this fever I have been running. It is interesting the things that go through your head when praying to the porcelain god. Family. Life. Choices.

I told my wife I almost died. Her first reaction was "What do you want me to do about it?".. Umm, how about some humanity? Compassion? Err.. too much, I know. "Go away" was my reply. She later came back and was more compassionate. I guess she is not totally heartless.

At least now I am feeling a little better. Although I did crap my pants sitting down to poker this afternoon. Liquid chocolate goodness. It should have been a sign to not play as I lost a buyin and an SNG. Oh well.

Saturday, March 11, 2006


I had 102 fever the other day and still feel crappy. Bah. I got in a few orbits of 2/4 yesterday. The buyin is a little intimidating for the moment but I am sure I will get used to it. I won 27$ in my couple of orbits on a suckout-re-suckout hands. Some guy plays 89o in EP. I flop TPTK with my AQ, he flops second pair, and JAMS me on the flop. I cold call. He turns a 9. I check-call. The river is an Ace. I bet. He raises. I call. He says "Nice River". Just as a note in my attempt to play tight on these tables I do not play 89o in any position except BB and possibly SB.

I also got into a 2-table SNG later that night. I took third. I should have taken first but that is poker. The second stack and I have equal chips. I have KJ he hs AQ. The flop comes KQJ. He puts ALL of his chips in on this flop drawing to a gutshot straight. He also has the ACE he rivers as an out. Ouch. I would have had 20K in chips vs 5K of my opponent. Oh well. Better luck next time. The thirty six bucks wasnt bad anyways. I will never understand how to play poker that badly I hope.

Friday, March 10, 2006

State of the Union

I am happy with my progress as a poker person this year. I have a lot of little victories I can hang on my mantle:

First in Saturdays with Dr. Pauly
First in WWDN, other ITM showings
First in 180/SNG

However this is not really where I think I have made my best strides. I truly believe I have taken some baby steps towards getting the tilt monkey off my back. I know you readers will not like that. It is much more amusing to see me donk of bankroll after bankroll but too bad. Now I do not think for a moment I am cured of the Insanity that caused me to change the blog name. I do think inherently I am inclined towards tilting. So keep reading. I think the past few weeks have shown a lot of growth though.

Here is the scenario. I score a nice hit in the 180/SNG. I then give a little of my win to the railbirds but go on a terrible bad three week downswing. I lose over 30% of my bankroll. In that period though I only took one shot at a limit I should not have. Even when my bankroll shot down under the 1K mark, which is psychologically damaging, I stood my ground. Instead of going to higher levels or trying to make it back quickly I went and played 1/2LHE which is WAY in my bankroll. I know this probably does not sound like much but it signals what I hope is a fundamental change in my thought process.

I also have started liking the limit games again. I used to do very well in them and I have tried to clear out the past year of insanity and figure out where I went wrong. Ok. Donking off 3K in a night is a wrong turn but really what changed in my game that made me hate LHE. I think there are many things including not wanting to play nickel and dime poker after attaining the giant step of 5/10. When I look past the surface though I think my game became aggressive for the sake of aggression and not for any good reason. I really believe this works against you in low limit HE games. I again say I could be wrong here. I had a nice year long run that most bloggers found unbelievable. I think this is because a less aggressive strategy leads to less variance. Especially in a schooling environment like 1/2LHE. I have no statistical data to back this up. I do believe there are multiple ways to win at poker and different approaches work for different people. I am going to stick with my approach and see how it works. With my new found wealth I am bankrolled for the 2/4 game and will be attempting to play it. So far the 1/2LHE game has seen me leave all three nights with between ½ and 1 full buyin up. Like I said this easily could be a statistical anomaly and I need a lot more hands.

The other big step I am making is changing my thinking process about HE. If you think LUCK does not play a HUGE factor then your wrong. I believe I said it before but skill earns you money over long periods of time. I am coming to terms with this. I used to reply to my wife when she said it was all luck "NO, IT IS ALL SKILL AND APPLYING ODDS". Well I was sort of right but that gives the impression that since I have some skill I will win. Thinking this way is dangerous. It makes you mad when you can not take home a win every night. It causes you to doubt that you have mad skillz when variance kicks you in the taint™ (Trauma). So the sooner you accept the fact that luck is a big part of this game the sooner you can accept your aces getting cracked by 47o and shrug it off.

I also want to give a shout out to all the bloggers who believe in a winning poker player like myself. Yes, I am back in the black by $600 or so right now over two years. So shoot me for being happy about that. I had a great time meeting up with Dr. Pauly. We had a good chat and I appreciate him believing in me. He told me some funny stories about his brothers antics at the poker tables and I TOTALLY want to meet this guy!! Foxwoods Derek! Foxwoods!!! Everyone BigChiefTokem, Veneno, Iggy, Garth, Trauma, and even April, and all of you other railbirds make it possible for me to keep my chin up when variance bites my ass and I appreciate each and every one of you. I have left out a lot of names because I want to leave the Uber-posting to Iggy but know that I appreciate you all and grow from your experience. Hoyoza get Yahoo! man. Nothing like the railbird cafe on Yahoo! when one of us goes deep!

I recently read DoubleAs post on what MTT and SNG wins really mean and basically he said anyone who has a sufficient bankroll should be able to win one of these. He stated the size of the field and the fact your mostly playing the same people every week. So what does that say about some of my scores? I actually agree somewhat with him. At this point in my game I would place myself in the category of solid middle of the pack guy for the level I play. I have my "A" game where everything goes right and I end up taking down a nice score. I also have a few games when I luck into a win. Last night is the only example I can think of but I am sure there are others. My specialty if you want to call it that is winning games with under 200 people. I am good with a small field. I feel any game of this size should lead to the better players winning eventually. The donkeys are going to have there nights in these too. So while I disagree it is ALL luck I do not think anything I have done so far makes me an elite player or anything other than slightly better than average in the 20$ and under MTT range.

So in summary I feel good. I think I have made a lot of progress towards being a long term successful player. I have a HUGE way to go but that is fine with me.

Thursday, March 09, 2006


Check your age stats by clicking here.

You said your birthday is 3 / 8 / 1969
which means you are 37 years old and about:

52 years 4 months younger than Walter Cronkite, age 89
47 years 8 months younger than Nancy Reagan, age 84
44 years 9 months younger than George Herbert Bush, age 81
37 years 5 months younger than Barbara Walters, age 74
35 years 4 months younger than Larry King, age 72
29 years 1 month younger than Ted Koppel, age 66
25 years 8 months younger than Geraldo Rivera, age 62
22 years 8 months younger than George W. Bush, age 59
17 years 8 months younger than Jesse Ventura, age 54
13 years 4 months younger than Bill Gates, age 50
8 years 6 months younger than Cal Ripken Jr., age 45
2 years 8 months younger than Mike Tyson, age 39
1 year 5 months older than Jennifer Lopez, age 35
6 years 10 months older than Tiger Woods, age 30
13 years 3 months older than Prince William, age 23

and that you were:

32 years old at the time of the 9-11 attack on America
30 years old on the first day of Y2K
28 years old when Princess Diana was killed in a car crash
26 years old at the time of Oklahoma City bombing
25 years old when O. J. Simpson was charged with murder
23 years old at the time of the 93 bombing of the World Trade Center
21 years old when Operation Desert Storm began
20 years old during the fall of the Berlin Wall
16 years old when the space shuttle Challenger exploded
14 years old when Apple introduced the Macintosh
14 years old during Sally Ride's travel in space
12 years old when Pres. Reagan was shot by John Hinckley, Jr.
10 years old at the time the Iran hostage crisis began
7 years old on the U.S.'s bicentennial Fourth of July
5 years old when President Nixon left office
3 years old when Alabama Gov. George C. Wallace was shot
not yet 1 year old at the time the first man stepped on the moon

Deserves to Lose

Kicking Taint

Trauma and I traded 20%. I finally paid off for him. Of course I have a fever, a cough, and feel like shit. Oh, and I FINALLY hit EPIC LUCKBOX proportions. I sucked out no less than ten times. Here are some of my favorites:

170 left and I call all in vs AT and KK. I have Pocket 9's. Trauma is screaming at me but I feel it baby. The flop comes TJQ. The ONLY card that can save me now is the 8. The turn brings it baby!

18 left. I have multiple all in hands with Ax vs Ax where the other guys x is higher. I suckout several of these on the river.

14 left. I have K6 s000ted vs a Beeatch who KEEPS RAISING TO STEAL MY BLINDS. I push over the top against him and he flips A5. I end up making my floosh! Was there any doubt?

5 left. I suckout with Ax vs Ax again.

3 left. I miss my suckout when I flop second pair vs TPTK. Yikes! Oh well. I played this hand VERY poorly. However I am not going to complain about 3rd.

If I had made the 11th suckout I would have been goot for second. Oh and I can play 2/4 limit now! Woot!

PokerStars Tournament #21041189, No Limit Hold'em
Buy-In: $20.00/$2.00
180 players
Total Prize Pool: $3600.00
Tournament started - 2006/03/09 - 20:36:42 (ET)

Dear SirFWALGMan,

You finished the tournament in 3rd place.
A $428.40 award has been credited to your Real Money account.

You earned 178.65 tournament leader points in this tournament.
For information about our tournament leader board, see our web site at

Thank you for participating.

Birthday Party for Sir

I am bored again so might as well ramble on about other stuff. I had my birthday the other day. It was cool. The kids like to shut all the lights off, hide behind the kitchen table, and jump out yelling surprise!!! I get a King’s crown birthday hat to wear for the night and a lot of excellent little kid artwork. Very nice. My kids are wacko but very cool. Here are a few stories.

When my son was a little 9-month old my wife used to drive him around in the back seat of the car. He would suddenly cough and totally be silent. Not a sound. My wife would pull over the car, lunge out into traffic, rip open the back door, and see him sitting there with a mischievous grin on his face. Yes, my son is trouble.

My daughter is very stubborn. When she was two I was telling her to go to her room in a slightly loud voice. She shouts back “NO!”, I say “Get to you room now I am the boss you will listen to me!” She replies dead seriously “Not the Boss, Momma Boss!”. How the hell can you fight against that?

My son likes to play tricks on people. When he was two we had him at a daycare facility in our town. Every morning the little people march down the hallway to go pee. One day the teachers notice my son is missing from the line. They hurry up and get all the kids back in class and search for him. As they are about to call the police they hear giggling coming from behind the coat rack. It is him hiding from them. Oh my!

It is both fun and challenging to have a family. The rewards are many and the responsibilities can be extremely challenging.

My Limit Experience

I am going to say something here that is probably really dumb and I will probably get laughed at but here it goes: PASSIVENESS WORKS BETTER IN 1/2 LHE. Why would I say this? It just seems that way to me. I had a great run at LHE playing a tight-passive game. I think ramping up aggression for me, as well as not staying at 2/4 for a long enough time, killed me. I know most people say you need to protect your hand, yadda yadda. Make as much money from the donkeys as you can. Yadda yadda. While I agree with this in concept I prefer the: Lose the least money from the donkeys approach. I will NEVER EVER JAM with TPTK. It just is not profitable enough at these levels. It is WAYYYY too easy for K6o donkey to hit his two pair and take you for an extra 3-4 bets even though the hand was capped pre-flop. I had a great example of this last night when I JAMMED AA pre-flop, got called by 9To, called to the river, and popped on the river when he hit trip 9's. I just cold called his river bet. The pot was too big to fold.

When will I JAM? When I have a mortal NUTS of course. I like to wait a bit if the board is draw heavy.. maybe JAM a little on the turn. Do I lose a bet or two? Maybe. Do I lose some bets when my AK is up agains KQ overplaying a Kxx flop. Possibly. Do I get sucked out on by Q6 when they turn the 6 to beat my AQ? Sure. Could I have gotten them to fold TP weak ass kicker? No Way. I have to beleive I lose alot less by paying the donkeys off very little. You know what? I also still get HUGE pots. Why? Because 3-4 people almost always see at least the turn in these things. Ok, not always, but alot of the time. I still get good value out of my good hands by the shear weight of the donkeys. So many ways to lose but when I hold up I win enough. When I get the mortal nuts I still get paid off. I just refuse to lose alot of money on medium strength hands or not beleiving the donkey that raises every hand could not have caught that straight on the board. So I am going to stay aggressive pre-flop, and somewhat passive post-flop. Betting my good hands but not going crazy. Not bluffing much. I will let you know how it goes.


Limit for sure. When your flushes run up against one out quads and your 2nd pair keep getting busted by OESD's or worse its time to go.. at least for a while..

Wednesday, March 08, 2006


Sorry Trauma.. gotta do what is making me the bucks and right now that is LHE. Why did I try and take it up again?

1. I did not have to start at the weenie levels. I have the roll for 1/2.
2. Iggy is doing it so everyone should follow blindly
3. Marge said it was good for Hella so why not me?

So I am swearing off the SNGs for a bit and going to one or two table 1/2LHE for a while. Here is what I have been seeing.

1. Tight is so FUCKING right. I had a VP$IP of 7% at one point.
2. Swings are HUGE in LHE so do not worry. I.E. Alot of times I will be knocked down to 20-30 from my initial buyin of 40. What does this mean? I lost two or three hands. No big deal. One or two good hands that hold up get me back.
3. People are stupid. I had a two REALLY good hands last night. One when I was down to fifteen bucks and took a 38$ pot to get me back to even. I flopped a set of jacks when I raised pre-flop.. and they held up. All other 5-6 people who went to the river with me had stupid draws or TP Weak ass Kicker. Thank you very much.

My second nice hand of the night was when I capped with AK s00ted. The flop was a HORRIBLE AKQ. Why is this bad? Because three people capping the pot pre-flop means AA/KK/QQ/AK or possibly TJ s00ted donkey. SO MANY HANDS COULD BEAT ME.

So my opponents cap the flop, 3-bet the turn, and 1 bet the river. All the while I am calling which is bad. However I really thought I might be beat and was looking for a straight or boat card because the pot was HUGE. In hindsite I probably should have folded my two pair. What do my Donkey pals show? TT and 88? WTF! Capping with a gutshot? I think you should be happy I am giving you free cards instead. Yeessshh.

So anyway for the moment I am liking LHE. I made almost 2-buyins yesterday and 1-buyin tonight after being down to 3.00 at one point. Ouch. Tomorrow it is all LHE. No tourneys (except WWDN) and no MTTs or SNGs. Lets go with what is working.

Kat 0, Veneno 2

This one was over pretty quickly. Kat was no match for Veneno. She must have given something really good to the Poker Goddess. Veneno beat me the first HU game tonight too. I promised her I would play three with her. I had her.. STONE COLD BLUFFING like usual, but instead of listening to my instincts I folded. It is funny when I play Veneno I usually have a psychic ability to know if she is bluffing or not. However, following these vibes is the hard part. How do you call off your entire stack on second pair and a vibe? Next time I am going to do it. I intend to sweep the next two. So Beware the UnluckBox Veneno!

Psycho of Poker

Go read Felicia's post on the Psychology of Poker. Very good Stuff.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Crazy Talk

So after some more cb suckouts tonight I decide to do some crazy ass shit and play some LHE. I liked it. I played 1/2, well in my bankroll, and I won $66 or so.. I donked that off on wonderful plays like AK all in vs A8.. 8K flop. WOO HOO! I am 91.5%!! WOOT! Umm, what is that eight thing on the turn.. umm.. ug?

In limit it was totally different. I had AA/KK like 8 times and they all held up. Weird. I played really tight which is right. I was down 20$ twice but was able to make it back and make a nice profit. Sweet. I may actually try some LHE this week.. hmm..

Apology in Advance

SteelerJosh has yet to rename the blog. He better hurry up. His time is running out. Only 5 more days! Just kidding man, I will give you the full week once you make up your mind.

So my favorite word of the night: CUNTBAG! Sorry. I have been running SO badly the past few weeks I am just glad I won that 180/SNG. I have been handling my bad run un-characteristically well though. At least so far. My one “tilt” playing of higher levels was a quickie $50/SNG. Otherwise I have been sticking to 2-3 10$ a night. Last night was no different. Played a 45/SNG and a 3$ Rebuy. Had over 20K in chips until my KK got cracked by QT. I got all the money in on the Q high flop.. blah blah blah.. and he rivered trips. CUNTBAG! I then got knocked out of the one when my A2o flopped two pair only to run up against A7o – two pair again. CUNTBAG! Oh wait, I was behind the whole time on that one wasn’t I? *sigh*. You know you have great friends by the way when you start cursing and they can not wait to either laugh or set the over/under on 60-CB's for the night. Thanks Boys!

The tilt control is working a little though. No major bankroll death. I am down over $250 since I won the 180/SNG which brings me slightly under 1K but I keep grinding away at the 10$ levels. I am hoping maybe the WWDN will pull me out of my slump. Who knows though. I am probably going to play some 25/NL cash game or maybe take a page from Iggy’s book and grind away some ½ LHE. Who knows. It sucks being in a rut though.


Ok, not really. I still have Anger Control issues. However I am fast coming to the realization that Poker is all about TINY TINY TINY TEANIE edges that are so small you can not measure them in a year. When we like to say “Poker is about skill not luck” we are really kidding ourselves if we think this means that we can win on any kind of consistent basis. What we can do is scratch out small edges over long periods of time and make a fucking boatload of money if we are willing to be patient, wait, not tilt, and not look at any small timeframes like years. Sometimes we may even hit the lottery and win a lot of cash in an MTT. However do not count on it. When you can truly internalize this then you will have become a poker player. I have years of therapy sessions to go.

I have also been thinking about the whole Poker Chump thing. I really do not understand all the hostility to the guy. I mean he is an immature, probably young, guy, who like to stir things up and start trouble. I am not sure he has said anything too controversial. He says his women would get smacked if they mouthed off to him. Well I for one thing he is full of shit. Just talking out of his ass like usual. Is it the most PC thing to say? No? Is it stupid and immature? Yeah. Does he really do it? I doubt it. Who knows. The other thing that got him into hot water was saying that he uses a women’s avatar to get more action. Well, I hate to say it, but it probably works. Not because women are inferior players. Some of the most fearful players to me are women. It is because men are pigs and A LOT of them underestimate women. It is a fact. They try to bully, and push around, and call down women players. So could you in theory get an edge by using this against them? Sure, why not? I know a lot of women poker players run into this in B&M casinos. They smile, and giggle, and take the suckers money all the way to the bank. Anyway I have played FAR worse people than the Poker Chump and have heard a lot more bullshit on blogs than what he spits out. I think if he grows up a little and stops typing LOLOLOLOL all the time I might even be able to read his blog. He also is not the worse player I have ever seen. I did not notice anything particularly innovative or any superstar play but I also did not see any total donkey play either. Decent solid play in general. IMHO.

Since I am spewing out all kinds of crap today as I sit bored at my stupid ass contract gig that is not supplying me enough work to make me happy and fulfilled or at least distracted for the day I might as well say a few things about Joe Speaker. I know nothing about the guy except what I read in his blog. However I was thinking about his writing lately and it has been some stellar stuff. I feel like it has really hit home with me. As I have mentioned in the past I am dealing with a lot of shit in my life. It makes me depressed and unavailable to my family at time. I have really been moved a lot by Joe’s writing about his own son AJ. Now I have not made any changes in my life or improved my situation, but every little nudge towards the hill helps, so thanks for sharing something so deep and painful. I really feel that every time someone opens their soul up to the world it connects at some deep level with many other humans and causes “things” to happen. Good things. Helpful things. So thanks a lot Joe!

See you all tonight at the WWDN. Do not miss the rescheduled Kat Fight tonight too. It starts at 10:30EST on Pokerstars so you have time before Wil’s tourney. Can Veneno vanquish Katitude? Will the Suckout Goddess go down?

In other uplifting new the Blogfather is going to be running some WSOP tourney entries. The good news? I could play in a WSOP. The bad news? Either Al or Iggy or Pauly would probably cause me to OD on Booze, Guinness, or Cronic, and die. Oh well. At least I will have some fun!

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Birthday Bash

Sorry for everyone who missed it. It was a great game. Last minute it had to be switched to Stars because of a Full Tilt server issue.

9:00 – DuggelChicken out playing The HAMMER! Perfect way to go out!
9:03 – Win a pot vs Garth. 999 flop. Sorta do not think he has it. My A8 is goot.
9:05 – Trauma makes a huge bluff bet with 45o. He wins.
9:10 – Veneno takes SoxLover out when he can not fathom her limping with an Ace HU in the SB.
9:15 – Trauma busts HRC with a DONKAAAY move.. Nice gutshot dude.
9:18 - DA wishes me Happy B-Day! Thanks Man! (He was too scared to play)
9:19 – Kaelin is next to go.
9:21 – My Ladies hold up against Trip-Jax for a nice doubleup.
9:23 - DNasty gets reamed by Trip-Jax tens with his 9’s.
9:24 – Trip-Jax is my bitch. He just donked off some more chips to me.
9:25 – The Shit talks flies

TripJax: i had the same hand from our last time
TripJax: you had me beat
Dealer: Game #4190013868: TraumaPoker wins pot (105)
Dealer: Garthmeister, it's your turn. You have 15 seconds to act
SirFWALGMan: ya I knew what you had by your bet
SirFWALGMan: :)
SirFWALGMan: remember I am better than you, lol
TripJax: easy to say after i tell you : )

9:26 – My Bitch leaves taken out by me. I sit in first place.
9:30 – Down to two tables. This is going fast.
9:33 – Trauma donks off 2K for me. When I river him with an Ace. I thought he was behind the whole way but he was actually ahead. He kept calling my bets until I rivered him. He then bet into me. I called. He said bad things to me.
9:36 – I suckout on Mookies KK with 33, he calls my all in, and rivers me with a K.
9:38 – Take a few chips from Veneno with Aces.
9:39 – Trauma folds his hand before the river because he is embarrassed by his hand.
9:40 – I am in first again. Sweet.
9:41 – Call a raise with the hammer. Had to fold it.
9:43 – Ingoal goes out. Trauma sucks out a flush when his TT gets cracked by a king on the flop.
9:48 – Josh sucks out on me with A8 and I suck out on Trauma with AQ. Trauma is out. JJ no goot.
9:52 – Veneno goes all in. Nobody is dumb enough to call her pre-flop. Suckout Goddess takes the blinds.
9:54 Hammer again. Had to fold it after I called 300 pre-flop.
9:55 Who invited Mookie? Lol.
9:58 – Seven people see the flop and its 88. Mookie takes it down with a King as everyone checks every street and Mookie turns the K.
9:59 – I made the first break. Fourteen left. Mookie, GCox, and SuckoutJosh round out the top three. Katitude is in seventh. Veneno is still in. I started this game in MEGA TILT and losing 6K has not helped. I started the game with a ton of AA,KK,AK,AQ hands and they seem to have dried up.
10:04 – Stb gets knocked out. KJ s00ted vs AK.
10:06 – Veneno gets AA and knocks me down to 260.
10:07 – A4 diamonds. I am dooooomed. Flopped top two pair and got checked down by Mookie and Steeler.
10:08 – A2 vs QJ. Hope it holds up.Mookie sucks out on me and I resuck on the river.
10:09 – AQ diamonds. JJ. I got 1800 chips now. It is cool. Better than the 260 Veneno left me with.
10:10 – Hoyazo gets taken out by SteelerJosh.
10:11 – Mookie calls my 450 raise with the Mook and Mooks out on me.
10:12 - AK, TT, all in twice in a row again. JJ calls and im done. Out in 11th. The deck was killing me and I still lost. That was fun. Veneno and Katitude Outlasted me too. That was interesting.
10:16 - Jules take Josh down a peg with her AA vs his 77. Mookie and Josh in first and second. *PUKE*. Just kidding guys.
10:17 – Nobody wants to play with Kats Bitches.
10:21 – SoxWife Takes Out Cox. *snicker*. Final table feature Kipper, HighOnPoker, SoxWife, Katitude (never though I would say that), Mookie, SteelerJosh, and Kats friend. Oh yeah and some dude named A10. Who the hell are you?
10:23 – Veneno Sucks out on Mookie.
10:24 – SoxWife Takes out Jordon! She is the chip leader by far.
10:26 – Kipper is all in. Takes the blinds.
10:26 – Part Duex: Kipper is all in again. Takes the blinds again.
10:28 – Veneno 99 all in vs Kipper QJ. Kipper doubles up. Veneno has 5K left. Kipper acts like a pussy and apologizes.
10:29 – SteelerJosh Re-Raises SoxWife. She folds like a girl.
10:31 – Veneno folds to aggression from SoxWife.
10:32 – Jewels gets a check-raise on her bluff and has to fold.
10:34 – SteelerJosh steals Jewels blinds
10:35 – Mookie takes Veneno out when his KQ outkicks her KJ on a KK3 flop. Kipper goes down with 9’s too. Donkey hand always wins. My dreams of a three way Kat fight stand with Jewels, Kat, and SoxWife.
10:38 – Jewels sucks out on Mookies set of sixes with AK diamond flush on the river.
10:40 – SoxWife takes the blinds.
10:41 – Mookie takes out SteelerJosh with AA vs 88. He has 16K in chips and is putting a damper on my all female final three.
10:43 – I figure out A104I9 is BigPirate. Woo hoo! I like him. Still cheering for a Female Final Three though.
10:47 – Katitude Drops The Hammer!
10:48 – SoxWife vs Mookie. Jewels folded pocket 4’s. Would have made a set. She woulda taken a lot of SoxWife’s stack.
10:50 – Kat Bets. BigPirate raises all in. Kat thinks. Kat folds. Kat has wireless problems. Kat keeps getting disconnected. This is really hurting my chances of three lady final.
10:53 – Jewels and BigPirate tangle. Jewels bets the turn and the Pirate folds to her AQ, Ace high, Nothing.
10:58 – Kat goes all in. SoxWife folds. A lot of folding in this game.
10:59 – Kat goes all in AGAIN and takes the blinds once more.
10:59 – Kat AK vs Mookie KJ. Kat may double up! She does not as the river brings a straight on the board. Mookie for sure has a HorseShoe up his ass.
11:00 – Big Pirate is all in. SoxWife calls. QQ vs 99 and SoxWife loses a few chips. At least the game is picking up. The blinds are 200/400. Largest stack is 16K.
11:02 – Katitude takes a hand. She is inching up there but still in last place.
11:03 – Kat moves into 5th place. Go Girl!
11:05 – Second break. Nobody has a commanding lead. As the FilmGeek would say “Weak”. Mookie is way ahead but is playing tight. No bullying.
11:06 – Everyone agrees to an 80-45-45-45-45 split. “Weak”.
11:13 – Jewels flops two pair and Mookie folds.
11:14 – Kat Bluffs. Kat Scores. BigPirate sinks further.
11:16 – Jewels takes out BigPirate and my dream of a final chick table lives!
11:17 – Mookie drops the Hammer! Jewels swears.
11:18 – Kat is out. K9 vs AK. Mookie gets the banner and my dreams are over.
11:22 – SoxWife finishes off Jewels. SoxWife did a semi-bluff all in with K8 and Jewels goes and calls with Q9. She does not improve. Next hand she goes out with 56 vs A8.
11:25 – Mookie is getting POUNDED on by SoxWife.
11:27 – Mookie is getting SPANKED. I wish I could say Jewels is getting Spanked by SoxWife. Sounds better.
11:29 – Mookie just give up.
11:30 – Kat suggests shopping for SoxWife: Eww.
11:32 – Mookie wins! Wow! Lucky bastard. HE was being dominated. Oh well. Good Job Mookie! SoxWife Ruled! Four out of six of the final table were women. Not bad ladies! Not Bad!

When Hammers Collide

Change of Venue

Due to the fact that my tourney generated too much interest and crashed Full Tilt we will be having the Birthday Tourney on Stars. Starts in an hour. Password: wafflesrocks.

HU Suckout fest will be rescheduled later.

Dont Miss the Fun

Starts at 7:30EST tonight on Full Tilt. Watch Veneno, the one out wonder, try and take on Katitude. This is Kats last chance to put a hurting on Veneno. Afterwards at 8:30 is my Birthday tourney. Several head hunting awards have been offered by bloggers. It should be a fun time.


Last two days have sucked. I just finished up a 27/person when I pushed my AA all in vs another player. He turns QT .. flops a K. Turns a 9. hmm.. Wonder what the river was.. Oh yeah! Fuckers.

Saturday, March 04, 2006


If the Donkeys knew anything about Poker they would kill themselves

Friday, March 03, 2006

Lucky Fuckers and John DAgostino

I had fun playing a 20$/MTT. I had 4K in chips, AA, and I got KK to put all his chips in the middle. Lets see here. He raises, I re-raise ALOT, he Re-Re-Raises, I PUSH ALL IN, and he fucking calls off almost all of his stack. I know it is beyond most players at this level to let KK go but sometimes I think AA is obvious. Fucktard! I am steaming now!!!!

I had a nice game of PL08 with John DAgostino. We are homies now. Check this out:

SirFWALGMan: do you know how to play this
game John?
SirFWALGMan: :)
tekiller (Observer): gl mr dagostino
John DAgostino: i dont know how to play any
SirFWALGMan: i was telling my friend you had a
bracelet, he told me I was wrong.. still much better
than me though, lol

DEALERMIKE (Observer): John.. i was watching a
tourny from 04.. i couldn't believe you touched
another guys chips to count his stack... do you
remember that tourny...??
Ptroy07 (Observer): john do you know the name
jerome graham?
SirFWALGMan: is john allowed to turn chat off, lol
nyczdon (Observer): gg
John DAgostino: my chat's not off
John DAgostino: lol

SirFWALGMan: is there a rule in your contract you
have to listen to us losers?
John DAgostino: no
Tom Mendenhall: he has a contract?
SirFWALGMan: I assume so
John DAgostino: i dont have to listen
ChrisEmo (Observer): lol
SirFWALGMan: cool
Ptroy07 (Observer): well do you know jerome
SirFWALGMan: im so blogging that. lol.
SirFWALGMan: john's like "What did my agent get
me into!"
Tom Mendenhall: he has an agent
tekiller (Observer): lol
tekiller (Observer): he dont mind he prolly kind of
likes seeing how many people are enfatuared by
joeybdb (Observer): he is thinking he would have a
better time in a back ally bar playing with mobsters

John DAgostino: yes i got it killer
Dealer: jrob420 wins the pot (225)
Dealer: Hand #476488626
John DAgostino: got my 2nd tv couple days ago
John DAgostino: two bigscreens side by side, split
SirFWALGMan: sweet
John DAgostino: been watchin 3 games at a time
all week
XxGraveDiggerxX (Observer): Cool!
SirFWALGMan: hey john can I borrrow 2$?
SirFWALGMan: lol
nyczdon (Observer): rofl

After I call my last 470 into a pot that is over 2K:

Simian8: remarkable
SirFWALGMan: ya like your AK play
Simian8: ?
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: what did I have to lose, 480 left in
a 2K pot
Simian8: you had nothin but an inside straight
SirFWALGMan: what did I have to lose?
Simian8: whatever
SirFWALGMan: lol
Simian8: no no
SirFWALGMan: lol
SirFWALGMan: ill do it again to, but only if its you
Simian8: lol
SirFWALGMan: in case you were confused by
John being here, this isnt the WPT

SirFWALGMan: hey if I outlast john does that
mean I am better than him, LMAO!
Dealer: John DAgostino shows [4c 8s 6d 7c]
joeybdb (Observer): no the big part was
Dealer: BJ316 shows a flush, Ace high
Dealer: John DAgostino shows a pair of Fours
Dealer: BJ316 wins the pot (1,628) with a flush,
Ace high
Dealer: Hand #476591895
SirFWALGMan: gg
SirFWALGMan: I think
BJ316: gg

Sir > John

Nightmare on Waffle Street?

...but let's just try and give you a taste, nightmare style. So, it's like you are told that you're going to find a treasure chest in your room full of diamonds and gold and you walk in, and find even more treasure than you had imagined. You feel so lucky, how blessed you are to just walk into so much! You are already greedily counting and day-dreaming about what you will buy with it all, and you reach for it, you get close enough that your hand brushes can feel the cool, hard edge of the first glinting blue diamond, when it all of a sudden becomes just an ordinary wooden bed, which is disappointing enough, but then you notice in the bed, your mom is there!!! And oh my god, she's being sodomized by a gigantic zodiac bear!!! What a swift and shocking transition! And then to add a touch of the bizarre, a giant crab waddles in, knocks you over (you break three ribs) and it then proceeds to decapitate your mom. Gallons of blood and unidentifiable innards that used to be your beloved mother spew all over the room, and you open your mouth to scream at the horror and frustration of it all, but before you can, a smirking man in glasses materializes in front of you, introduces himself as Mark Standerfer, looks around at the carnage, but then simply shrugs and has time to say, "You're so emotional, it's just vari-" before the crab also snips him in half. Before you can even truly register all of that, the crab and bear fight to the death, and the bear wins...which in of itself isn't so bad, but with dawning terror, you realize that just leaves you and the horny 9-foot bear in the room together... and before you know it, you're under his massive paws and he's doing the unspeakable to you, with his proportionally large bear unit.
- Eston

Not as great as my blog, because I need more details. However he did bust a 20K stack in a short period of time... so he beats me there.. I have made and busted only 5-6K myself. Anyway, I feel his pain.. not right this minute, but is resonates. I am going to ask but I assume he was playing WAYYYY above his bankroll limits. Let this be a lesson.

Good News

We are catching up to Al! If certain Chicago bloggers would sign my Frappr we might even stand a chance. For those who are keeping track AlCantHang has 86 Frappr entries. He had around that when this started. Sir Waffles has gained 51 Frappr entries in this time.. only 35 to go people! Lets get this done and beat Al!!

Super Easy

Go Here and get support to kill the online gambling bill. It is super easy. I barely even read the text.. probably not the best thing.. now Barney the Purple Democrat from MA knows how I feel.

Hammer Baby!

Overall a pretty damn good night. I spent the first part donating to SoxLover in the cash game at FT. I dropped $120 there. Oh well. I do not seem to be able to get anything going at FT yet. I am hoping to hit an MTT or something and get a workable bankroll there.

So then I hit Stars. As most of you know I have been running a little badly this end of Feb. Not badly in the sense of the bankroll failing but I swear I had not won a single SNG in two weeks. Last night that all changed.

I start off by getting some confidence by beating a single table. I then enter the 45/SNG. I was small stacked most of the game but I took over the final table. I got some good cards at good times. I pushed all in three times in a row and then look down and see Pocket Rockets.. so I push again. I get a caller and all of a sudden I have chips! Woo Hoo! I really do not remember much else except when it was down to three and I had that HUGE chip lead I flopped an OESD with 72o. Obviously I had to call the additional 5K bet. I turned the straight and then basically just kept going all in with the last guy. It did not last long.

First place and $139 richer the Hoki-Vegas Bloggers ask me to play a two-tabler. I ran over that one too. I spared G-Cox so that he could take third and I ended up finishing in second. The hand I lost to was my QQ vs his 76c. He rivered a sf. Umm. Great. All the money was in pre-flop. It hardly bothered me though as I took $54 for that one.

I also joined one of the smallest WWDN's in history. I made the final table but busted out first hand. I was bluffing against Quantloos which is a bad idea since that guy NEVER EVER NEVER FOLDS. I had not seen him play so I had no idea. He called my all in with A7o on a AKQ and maybe flush board. Oh well. Perhaps he reads my blog. I saw him make FAR WORSE calls and EVERY SINGLE TIME HE SUCKED OUT.. I mean it was crazy. It was for sure his night as he easily took first. Congrats! Everyone was a little pissed at the guy I am sure.. I found it a little amusing. It was almost like the male version of Veneno!

So I am not sure what I am going to play tonight. I have the bankroll to start playing 20$ SNGs. It is sitting around 1200 right now. Wes says I can!!! I will probably alternate between 20's and 10's, and throw a few 45/SNGs in the mix. I really like those. Probably because I have taken first twice in the past month having played a limited number of them. I also will need to hit the 180/SNG at least once a week, and try and score in a good ole' fasion MTT. Good luck to you all!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Sir Waffles Birthday

It is shaping up to be a good bash. I think DoubleAs might show up. At least he is promoting the thing for me. I would love to play some poker with that guy. His writing impresses me.

The prizes are starting to come in:

Hoyza has offered a small cash bounty on his head. We should probably nail down the amount since he is a shifty character and probably will not make good anyways. heh.

Katitude has graciously offered - one custom blog banner or sidebar graphic to the blogger who takes her out. She does web sites for a living so this is a very good offer.

All of my proceeds for this event are going to be donated for Cancer research. It is all the rage these days you know. I have actually been effected a lot by the C-Bug. One of my first experiences with death was when my Aunt (who was younger than me) died at sixteen years of age or something like that. My Grandfather was an old fashion man and along with beatings and the like that were common back then he smoked like a chimney. His fingers were actually yellow all the way down to the knuckle. Of course this inevitably effected my aunt. We were fairly close and it was a strange time.

Later on my Grandfather finally got his dose. He ended up dying of mouth cancer. Of course this past year my father passed away of lung cancer. He was another smoker and hitter for that matter. It is very interesting how patterns are destined to repeat themselves until the chain is broken. My nephew also has suffered from Leukemia as well as a bad mother and no father. He seemed to have come through the whole experience with some learning disabilities and loose teeth, however, lately, he has started having some strange seizures and we are not sure how that is going to work out. I do not believe cancer has been implicated in this one but it is totally possible that this is some side effect of years of Chemo.

So like most people I know the big C has had an effect on my life and giving back a little bit is the right thing to do. Anyway, see you there, and lets have a lot of fun!

Is Online Poker Rigged?

Interesting blog I came across today. I am such a nerd. 460 blogs and climbing. I read every one of them too.. blah. Is Online Poker Safe is a site that solely refutes online cheating theories. Now in some ways I think this might just be a shill for Pokerstars. They get money from PS or other big Poker sites and drone on about how it is impossible for cheating to happen. In reality I do not *think* this is a shill for any of the big online sites, however, some of the reasoning on the blog is naive and not well thought out. It does however gives you some things to think about next time you say "RiverStars" or some other snide comment.

Sunday's Correction

The times are wrong on both events. Catfight is at 7:30 p.m. and the Waffle Bday Bash is at 8:30 p.m. I will ask Jordan to fix the banner.
- YoSoyVeneno

I have decided to donate all my winnings from my Birthday Bash to Cancer. Not including any weird side-bet gifts I win. You see I think cancer has been getting teamed up on too much lately. I mean the poor guy, all he wants to do is grow. Everyone with there "kill" cancer hater tourneys are really making it hard on him. Why does everyone always want to team up on a successful go getter? Jeez. So all of my proceeds from the bash are going straight to cancer. We can find a way to spread it quicker!! Possibly I will put the money in "Start Smoking" ad's in 3rd World countries like Australia, or maybe I will just buy a carton of marlboro's for Garthmeister. Either way I will do my best.

Actually my winnings will be directly deposited here, shhh, don't tell anyone I am a softy.

A chip and a chair

Last night was interesting to say the least. First I played some HU action at the Talking Poker HU Challenge. I won my first match easily but then got destroyed my second match when my opponent had A8,AA, and AJ all in a row. The Talking Poker forum is a pretty cool place. Unfortionatly that caused me to miss Mookies tourney. Sorry man! Next week for sure!!! Garthmeister showed up though and had a good time.

Next on my list was trying to break my curse at Stars. I have gone two weeks without winning a 1-table SNG. That HAS GOT to be a Donkey record. So instead of losing two 10$/SNGs in a row I decide to lose quicker and play a 20$. I ended up taking first. I think my opponent was a little mad that my 46o made a straight and kicked his ass. What kind of donkey plays 46o HU?

So with my curse lifted (at least for a moment) and a smile on my face I decided to check out the FT cash games again. They have been nice to me. I know I suck as a cash player (more on this later) but maybe I can improved. I am up over 140 bucks on FT in just over 3 days so who knows.

One of the first hands I have A9 and the flop is 95x. I pot it and get one caller. The turn is another five. Now it is HU and the guy bets into me. Here is where I make a mistake. I re-raise him all in. Umm. Why? I have no idea. Here is an important thing I have to keep reminding myself in cash games kids: Pick better spots. You have no need to speculate THAT MUCH with a hand like that. Just be more patient. Pick better spots to invest.

So I am down to .75 cents and feeling stupid. I decide to push all in and go to another table so I can be less embaressed. I get six callers and my Ax holds up. Now I have five bucks. Ok. I get AJ s00ted next. Neato. So I push again and get two callers. The donkey who busted me bets the flop and the other guy folds. He flips KT and my AJ holds up. The guy who folded says he had AQ and I would have been going home. So now I have worked my stack back up to fifteen bucks. I then go back to playing solid poker and end up with a dollar profit. Way to go Sir!

One other thing. Some guy was chasing a gutshot draw for a 2$ pot-bet, when he had ten bucks left, and I had about $50. He then tells me that he played it perfectly, and that the IMPLIED odds if he hit his straight were huge. In this situation I did not agree.. also, how cal you get implied odds on a hand that is easy to detect? If he hits the straight and makes a large bet I am folding. I can see this possibly in a larger priced game where the stacks were bigger and the aggression and bluffing was AMPED through the roof. If one of you high rollers want to write up something about when it is good to chase a gutshot draw against a pot sized bet that would be interesting reading.

A few other things. Congrats to Scary Lady Joanne for beating the Poker chump! Goot job. I knew she was going to win the whole thing. I picked her from the start. Although she was down at the beginning, and I had to help her get a 2 outer against Maudie, she pulled it off. Both ladies played exceptionally well. Good job!

My Aqua Lung tried to kill me last night. I wake up in the middle of the night having problems breathing. The Aqua Lung is no longer sending me pleasant streams of air, instead it is only on SUCK mode. I quickly remove it and try to shut the machine down. It will not shut off. Instead it tries to suck all the oxygen from the room. I look at the control panel and it reads: CPAP or REDRUM. I am not sure which since I was a little tired. I quickly pull the plug out and go back to sleep. NeverAlways trust a machine!!!!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Goings On

A lot of little tourneys and news going around the blogsphere. So here they are in no particular order. It is nice to see people starting up Internet “Home Game”:

Tonight is Moogie’s SNG. Ok, it is an MTT, and last week I hear they got about twenty five to show up. Sure, when I come, only have ten! Fun guys. A lot of trash talking. Nice game.

Thursday night is WWDN:West Coast Style. It is on Pokerstars. It usually gets a few less people since it starts at 10:30 or some other god awful time that west coast J-walking maniacs probably like. A ten dollar buyin for that one. I attend all of the WWDN events that I can so I can be knocked out in second to last place. It is a trip. Password as always is monkey.

Some fine peeps over at Noble Poker are having another charity event. I hear Noble threw in a seat at a small WSOP event and some cash or something. Seems interesting. I will not be personally attending this one because I do not want to signup for a Noble account but if you have one it should be a blast.

Site: Noble Poker
Date: Thursday March 2nd, 2006
Time: 7:30pm ET
Password: charity

My Birthday Bash. Hoyza has offered a small cash bounty on his head. I have offered naming rights to my blog for one week on my head. Other prizes are sure to be announced in the upcoming week.

The Kat Fight I started continues this week. We changed the time to 7:00PM EST this Sunday because Katitude was too sleepy the last time. She almost poured coffee on her head. The last one was a blast and Veneno lived up to her title as the Suckout Goddess when her set of fours turned into “DEMS QUAD BEEATCHES!” against Kats flopped set of Kings! The fun should continue in Part Two: The One Out Wonder.