Monday, July 17, 2006

Poker at the Red Rock

We were all headed to the Red Rock casino via Don’s white pimpmobile. It was Ick, Kitty, Jewels, Don, and we were joined by StatikKling. Unfortunately the fabulous Carmen had to work. I will tell you right now I was feeling a little sad that I would have to leave Vegas without seeing her again.

It was a crazy ride out to the Red Rock. Don was taking all kinds of pictures of the people in the van instead of ohhh lets say DRIVING! If someone has one of the pics with Don’s head turned 180 degrees around please send it to the Vegas PD immediately. It was a beautiful ride. It is hard to describe the mountains surrounding this part of Vegas. I found them to be stunning. We finally arrived at the Casino.

I have to say I liked this place a lot better than the MGM. In the MGM it was dark and noisy and really hard to concentrate. In contrast the Red Rock poker room is all by itself and close to the doors to the outside. You are allowed to see sunshine when you play. I am not a huge fan of sunshine but this worked out well. The dealers were more professional than at the MGM in my opinion. Very friendly and couple of real lookers in the group too. The waitresses were way classier than at the MGM. I mean we are talking New York escort vs Crack Whore on 22nd street here. I was very impressed as they tried to rub their huge mammary glands against Icks head.

The poker here was of a kind that I actually can play. I do not know what it says about people but I find Tight-Aggressive games to suit my style. I can put people on hands and clean up. I proceeded to do so this time.

Somehow at this game I got a reputation for being a stone cold killer. I took full advantage of it. I raised people blinds constantly and before I left I had a huge stack of whites and grays. All from uncontested blind steals. Tight-Aggressive people fold. I really can not remember any stellar plays. I did flop the nut straight and was able to stack the guy who had two pair. He wondered why in the world I would push all in on the flop with my nut straight. I guess because you were going to call me and I knew it. The guy who made that call would be my bitch for the night and most of my profit came from him. He was a good player. Solid Tight-Aggressive. Easy to read. Take some notes people.

Ick on the other hand could get no table respect at all. I saw him raise a hand four times and each time this Granny of about seventy years of age shouted out "Take that Bitch!" and re-raised him a huge amount. She then proceeded to outplay him on the flop so badly that I thought he was going to cry. If that was not bad enough once she left ANOTHER old guy sat down and did the exact same thing. I was laughing so hard I almost cried. I think pictures of Ick are now posted on the game board of the local Vegas nursing homes.

Sometime during the game the hot dealer said something about needing a rubdown. I must have misheard although Ick swears I was correct. Apparently while Ick, Kat and I were having fun at the 1/2NL fish house Jewels was cleaning out the 2/5NL tables. Don was treading water. I think Statik ended up bailing on the Poker early and nerded out with his awesome camera. It was a great time for everyone capped off by some delicious BBQ food and some solid poker conversation!! I again highly recommend the Red Rock and not just because I cashed out up over 175 without really having any high stress moments but because it is a great casino off the beaten path of the strip.

Afterwards we headed back to pickup my pants at Icks hotel room. Don then said we should head on over to Carmens work. I would not have suggested it because I did not want her to get in trouble with he boss but Don said it was ok. As we were walking over to her restaurant all of a sudden this BEAUTIFUL blonde rocket shoots between Ick and me and starts slurring something about wanting to do JelloShots off of Icks hardened abs. I can not possibly do justice to how gorgeous this creature was or how drunk off her ass either. Ick could have had her every which way but loose if he wanted to but being the faithful pup that he is he calmly pried her talons off of him and slinked away tail between legs. She trotted back to her friends almost in tears saying that she was shot down. Poor Princess JelloShots! Keep flying baby!

We finally arrived at Carmens place of employment and she came out. Instead of her stunning, cleavage revealing tops of the past, the heathens made her dress in a plain black shirt and black pants. While it was surely drabber than what I was used to it did not diminish her beauty at all. She quickly came up and gave me a huge warm hug goodbye.. when Ick went in for his hug I could see her body language pull away. Ha! Finally someone who saw Ick for the spawn of evil he really is! Sadly we had to leave her to her work.

As we left the restaurant Ick had a frightened, hunted look in his eyes. Don lead us back towards Princess JelloShot and Ick pleaded with him to find another way out. I cackled with glee as Don told him that this was a dead end. Of course I did my best to hide Ick from the princess as we passed by her again.. I swear I did not yell my loudest!!!! What are friends for?

Don drove me to the airport.. standup kind of guy that he was. I bought a few knick knacks for the kiddies and flew home on the red eye passing in and out of conciseness. My first trip with the bloggers was done. I had a great time. I would even say it was amazing.

Next Episode: Epilogue


Blogger SirFWALGMan said...

Now that you have read my posting completely go back and click on every reference to Ick's name that has a link.

2:51 PM

Blogger slb159 said...

That even tops the picture jjok has of me of his site (after I told him to keep it discreet, since I didn't want our secret love emails and sex chat to be publicized.) But oh well, guess he's just proud he has the relationship that he does with me.

3:30 PM

Blogger iamhoff said...

Dude. You have waaaaay too much time on your hands. I must say, tho, impressive job getting all the links set up. Definitely looking forward to December...

5:07 PM

Blogger Shelly said...

LOL nice linkage! I've never played at Red Rocks. Sounds nice. I'll have to check it out someday

9:36 PM

Blogger Iakaris aka I.A.K. said...

Too Fucking Funny.

This monstrous, unlawful thing is a perfection realized. Mercy, Waffles, Mercy...

So much for no such thing as bad publicity. Once my lawyer gets through with Hacker, it's on to you.

Poor Princess Jelloshot. Where was the Bracelet when he was truly needed? Marriage: it ain't for the weak-willed or faint-hearted...

Lastly, let me state for the record what the rest of us are perfectly clear on: Carmen would definitely have given me a huge goodbye hug, in fact she was moving in to do so. Right then she and I both saw the tears welling in your eyes, and watched your lip trembling like your hands when you holding the nuts (or your nuts). In that moment she and I both realized you were hanging onto what little sanity you possess by a thread. So she held back a little for YOUR sake. What a gal.

But don't worry, I'll be sure to give her a big hug hello (assuming D allows it of course) when I see her again IN 3 WEEKS! Photos to follow no doubt, brotha.

Ya like apples Waffles?

Well how ya like dem apples!

Your hero (and mine),


10:41 PM

Blogger CarmenSinCity said...

Do you know how much I enjoying reading your blog when I get home from a long night at work baby?? Keep up the good work. The link thing was extra special. So creative!!

11:37 PM

Blogger Eric a.k.a. Bone Daddy said...

And Don Gave you a ride to the airport, must of wanted to get you out of town. In jersey, we would of given you the Aadrainna treatment and left you to die in a swamp "on your ride to the airport". Gee, Don really is a nice guy.

10:39 AM


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