I haz Skillz

Apparently I have inadvertently pissed off another person who I really like and did not mean to piss off. I am good at that. If someone asked what my super power is I would definitely say "Pissing off people power". I really do not mean to do it but I am a natural. Ah well. All I can say is Sorry.

I really thought, and still think, that what I said was correct. However if I said something that was construed as insulting I really did not mean it that way. The worst part is I seem to irritate this person semi-annually. It seems like every three or four months I say something offensive. I really think this person is awesome too so it is a shame. Ah well. Nuff said.

I am really thinking seriously of bailing on Vegas this year. I am just in a funk and do not feel like I am going to pull my head out of my ass enough to go. Perhaps something will happen to convince me otherwise. Anyway hope things are going better for you all than they are for me.

November Nine

I was going to tell you about the fabulous writeup AlCantHang had on the November Nine and the final table action. I then read Dr. Pauly and saw what an ass clown Al really is. Seriously though really good work from both guys which especially surprises me with Al not so much the Doctor. Perhaps he hired a hooker to do his writing while he drank to oblivion in the bar? Either way worth reading both unless you do not want to ruin the surprise. I believe the broadcast is on ESPN tonight from 9-11 also. Have fun.

As for me I am still in a funk.

Idiot 2+2 Guys

I think the 2+2 typical person is a moron. I do chuckle to the Bling Blang Blaow guy. You know the guy who took your money and is now going to rub it on his titties. I figure I need my own poker poem:

RANT RAVE SCREAM
YOU STOLE MY MONEY
I COULD HAVE BOUGHT FOOD
BUT YOU HIT YOUR FUCKING TWO OUTER
NOW I CANT RUB YOU MONEY ON MY TITTIES

TWO OUTS > MY MONEY > SAD TITTIES > BREAK EVEN

Freaking Aholes

My wife just came back from a meeting with the arbitrator for special ed. Basically this is the person who fairly and unbiasedly steps in and discusses options for children with learning needs. My son is diagnoses as having dyslexia and other issues related to this. The school has been very unhelpful in getting him the education he needs. He is currently in fifth grade.

So the mediator basically told my wife that she should be happy and let my son become a basket weaver. He will do good in things that do not need reading skills she said like marketing and sales.

When this tact did not appear to get the desired result, the wife agreeing to the non-plan they have, she then said well if you decide to sue the school to get proper training and you lose then you will be stuck paying huge legal bills to the school for the case.

Mediator my ass. I am so fucking pissed. I swear I feel like shooting a load in her eye and saying "Hey you could be a fucking whore for a living". Stupid fat cow. Despite his reading issues my son is very intelligent and it makes me extremely mad that they are trying to write him off in fifth freaking grade. Although I have reservations about his proclamations of becoming a filthy rich baseball player or football player at this time I have no doubt he will be successful in whatever he does. He is too smart to fail. Bureaucracy is so fucking retarded.

Teh Suck

Here I sit naked, curled in a ball of loathing and self hate surrounded by the discarded bones of poor unfortunate recess peanut butter cups. I am not sure why I am sick and tired but I am. I give up on exercise. I will just except the blah.

I hate Poker and Life Suicide might be good

Alright not really serious about that but life is pissing me off. I had fun fucking .01/.02 table. I jammed every hand for fun. The little retards got really mad. It was fun as hell. Wish poker was fun in general.

SuperGirl126: for 2 cents..
Michael Cb: wtf dude
SuperGirl126: your not a maniac- your just dumb.....
pants_en_fuego: whoooooo
SuperGirl126: hahahahahaha
bruni87: nice
SuperGirl126: hahahahahaha
bruni87: loser
Maniac57: lol
Maniac57: im glad to make you laugh
Maniac57: it is my job
bruni87: thats good for you
Maniac57: please buy condoms with your winnings because we do not want any more .01/.02 people in the world
bruni87: keep on doing that

It is fun to play higher stakes games. Everyone playing those games are stupid as hell. I played a 100+9 SNG. I raise, fire three barrels, and what do I get called by? Some dick with A3o? I mean really? Not like I jammed the pot either. I made nice 3/4 pot bets. Stupid retards everywhere. I need to find a better way to make money. Perhaps I will become a Male Gigilo.

New Website

I was thinking of a cool website "Fucked Up Interviews.Com". You basically get people to have you come in you bug the office before hand so you can get reactions of the key people and then you come to your interview and do some fucked up shit.

Like maybe dress up like a roman with a sword and shit and when they come to interview you draw your sword and say in a deep voice "I AM AN EPIC PROGRAMMER!". "HEROIC IN MY BUG FIXING". "YOU MUST HIRE ME!".

Or like wear a shirt that is inappropriate. Like have a black dude go in with a shirt that reads "The Honkey Oppresses my People" or a chick in a thong. She could ask the interviewers if they mind if she stretches before the interview.

1000 Words About Poker Tonight

Bloggers Are Annoying

A bunch of this is going to be tongue and cheek but I feel like calling out a bunch of retarded statements I have seen in recent blog posts. First one goes out to Rakewell. Congrats on winning the Mookie and going on a nice run. He writes

If so, may CK and the poker gods forgive me! Also if so, phenomenal laydown, CK.

So let's review. Rakewell flops the nut with A5 and CK maybe has two pair. It goes something like Bet, Raise, Re-Raise, Re-Re-Raise. How is this a PHENOMENAL laydown by CK? I mean fuck me. She knows that Rakewell is not a fucking total donkey. He is showing a ton of strength followed by a jam. Of course a stunningly beautiful and awesome player like CK is going to know she is beat. It is not a PHENOMENAL laydown. It is fucking average at best. Can we leave Phenomenal for really good laydowns please? Twit.

Next lets give the stupidest man alive a fucking shoutout. Hoyazo you stupid fuck. I love your ridiculous predictions. Instead of realizing that people get totally burned out after BBT events and some get busted and need some time to reload Hoyazo proclaims the end of the world. What a fucking moron. Thirty five fucking people last night. Another idiotic prediction by the jackass. He will obviously write another post now declaring how he was totally right and somehow his uber brilliance has lead to the Mookie regaining it's former luster. He is so fucking wrong so often I am glad he picked the Yankees. I think he picked the Yankees but I am unsure as I fell asleep after the nineteenth page.

While we are on the subject of fucktard Hoyazo can someone tell me why he contradicts himself in his own blog posts. I mean it is bad enough that he denies saying things, gets things totally wrong, and writes opposing posts later on but can he at LEAST keep his opinions consistent in a single post? It fucking drives me nuts. I mean I am reading about him saying one ridiculous thing and the like two paragraphs later he totally contradicts himself with some other moronic sentence. He is the epitome of monkeys smashing keys to try and make Shakespeare.

What the fuck is wrong with BuddyDonk and the morons playing to Mookie? I played last night and decided to fuck around. So I raise the hammer in EP. Now I know I am old school and that you yougins may not remember the hammer so well but fuck you all. The Hammer is king. So this retard in the Mookie in second position calls with A7o. Now raising the hammer in EP may be asking for trouble but you have to be special retarded to call with Ax. It is reserved for the white helmet retards.

The flop comes AAK. I am in the mood to have fun and see how far I can take a hammer bluff. So I lead out for half pot looking like I want a call. Repping a big hand or something to Stupid System retards. He calls. I then lead out again on the turn for half pot like I want a call and he obliges by calling. On the river I fucking go nuts to the wall ballah and jam my entire stack in. Now the reason I know this guy is a retard is because he uses up his timebank to make the call. He thought I had AK because I laid down a plausible line and he figured he was beat but made the call. Definition of a retard and ENTIRELY the reason you do not play A7 like that against an early position raise. You can NEVER know if your weak ace is good.

So then Buddy gives me crap about going to the felt with the Hammah? First off my play was 10,000,000 times better than my o-pponents but irregardless of that I DROPPED A MASSIVE HAMMER BLUFF!!! I should be given a fucking parade for Christ sakes. You married old school Buddy you better start liking the Hammah or I will dope slap you myself! Can you imagine the EPiC humor if he had actually folded to my river bet and I showed? That would have been priceless.

Gah I love Bloggers!